The Bachelor’s Got a Girl in a Sloth Costume Because Why the Heck Not

The Bachelor Season 23The wait is over.
After many long months, we finally know what weird costume one of the contestants on the new season of The Bachelor will wear and henceforth spend the entire season…

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Stephen Curry shot the ball through the hoop twice because he’s Stephen Curry

Kevin Durant had 33 points and 13 rebounds, Stephen Curry contributed 28 points. You will never beat Stephen Curry in a game of basketball or H-O-R-S-E. He simply doesn’t miss shots. Before the Golden State Warriors collided with the Minnesota Timberwolves on Friday night, Curry left the crowd and his teammates in awe with this eye-popping shot.

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Would You Wear a Nose Warmer? Because They’re a Thing Now (Really!)

Now more than ever, clothing companies offer a huge assortment of items designed to keep you bundled up and warm in the frigid winter weather. You can wear cute beanies (Meghan Markle and Prince Harry are fans), cozy scarves, cashmere sweaters, fuzzy gloves and Kendall Jenner approved-puffers. But one area of the body always seems to be neglected: The nose.

Not anymore!

Enter the Nose Warmer Company, a U.K. brand that produces knit nose caps so people can keep their nostrils from freezing in the cold.

“Our business started small, with one nose warmer made specifically to do the job of warming up a nippy nose!” the brand’s site reads. “Our owner soon realized that she wasn’t the only one with this problem so ….. THE NOSE WARMER COMPANY was born.”

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The Nose Warmer comes in a variety of styles, all retailing around $ 10 a pop. You can get a red fleece nose with a bell attached so you can channel your inner Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, a dalmatian-inspired faux fur design or ones made of crocheted wool in your favorite color.

RELATED PHOTOS: The Most Stylish Sweaters to Buy This Fall

“It is an interesting-looking accessory to add to your wardrobe, albeit very effective,” one customer said of their Nose Warmer. “Just what I wanted and warm too in this bitter weather.”

Nose warmers ship around the world.


PEOPLE.com

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Ellen DeGeneres Scares Because She Cares: See Her Funniest Scares & Spooks Over the Years Now

Sarah Paulson, The Ellen DeGeneres Show, ScaredScaring is caring…at least when it comes to Ellen DeGeneres!
The Ellen DeGeneres Show host is all about having fun on her talk show, which means scaring her guests on a regular basis….

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Modell’s Sporting Goods – “National Just Because Day”, Take 30% off 1 Regular Price Item at Modells.com. Use Code WHYNOT

“National Just Because Day”, Take 30% off 1 Regular Price Item at Modells.com. Use Code WHYNOT
Code: WHYNOT
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Smart luggage firms close because of airline battery rules

Two firms have closed this month, citing changes in airline policies on carrying batteries.
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6 Things the World Is Buying Because of Meghan Markle

ESC: Meghan Markle“The Meghan Effect” is very real.
Although Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have yet to say “I do,” the princess-to-be has already made a major global impact on style….

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6 Things the World Is Buying Because of Meghan Markle

ESC: Meghan Markle“The Meghan Effect” is very real.
Although Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have yet to say “I do,” the princess-to-be has already made a major global impact on style….

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Frill Hem Pants, Because Gigi Hadid Makes Them Look so Easy

ESC: Gigi HadidIf a trend has Gigi Hadid’s stamp of approval, you know it will have legs…literally and figuratively.
The supermodel is the queen of all things pants, whether that means living in…

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Kendrick Lamar Won A Pulitzer Because ‘DAMN’ Is Journalism

Before y’all drag me, let me explain.
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Cardi B Says She Kept Her Pregnancy A Secret Because People Are ‘So Thirsty’

The rapper denied she was pregnant in February, saying she was “just getting fat.”
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Kelly Clarkson Is a Voice Coach Because She Loves The Voice

Kelly Clarkson, The Voice Season 14Kelly Clarkson is so excited to be a coach on The Voice.
The singer took the stage for NBC’s winter press day on Tuesday to talk about the upcoming season of the singing competition…

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School District Scrubs ‘To Kill A Mockingbird’ Because It Makes People ‘Uncomfortable’

“If ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’ makes you uncomfortable, you should probably be reading ‘To Kill a Mockingbird.'”
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Woman Killed by Husband at Football Party Shooting Left Him Because of His Drinking: Friend

Meredith Hight, the Texas woman whose estranged husband fatally shot her Sunday along with seven other people during a football watching party at her Plano residence before being fatally shot by police, left the man because of his drinking, a friend tells PEOPLE.

“She me that Spencer had an alcohol problem and she wanted him to go to rehab but she couldn’t get him to,” Meredith’s friend and hairdresser, Adriana Vaga, tells PEOPLE. “She told me that a doctor said if he would not stop drinking in a year he would die.”

In July, Meredith filed for divorce from her husband of six years, according to Collin County court records. Vaga says her friend realized she had to take care of herself first.

“I told her to do what was best for her so she could move on with her life, because I didn’t want her to feel trapped in this marriage that she didn’t have to stay in,” she says.

According to Meredith’s mother, Spencer was having trouble moving on from the separation.

 

On Sunday night, Meredith, 27, who was hosting a cookout and football watching party, was fatally shot along with seven of her friends.

Police arrived at the scene and fatally shot Spencer.

Besides Meredith, the deceased victims have been identified as Anthony Michael Cross, 33; Olivia Nicole Deffner, 24; James Richard Dunlop, 29; Darryl William Hawkins, 22; Rion Christopher Morgan, 31; Myah Sade Bass, 28; and 25-year-old Caleb Seth Edwards.

• Want to keep up with the latest crime coverage? Click here to get breaking crime news, ongoing trial coverage and details of intriguing unsolved cases in the True Crime Newsletter. 

Vaga met the Hights six years ago through a friend, she says. Immediately, she and Meredith hit it off, while Spencer, she recalls, was distant.

“Spencer never talked to me very much but it was kind of weird. I tried talking to him but he kept to himself. I think he was very detached,” Vaga says.

 

Vaga says when she met Meredith, the couple, who wed in May 2011, were newly married and seemed very much in love. However, things became strained when Spencer was laid off from his job in 2013 and began drinking excessively, Meredith told Vaga.

Meredith, who worked at home for Coca Cola Industries, tried to remain positive but found it difficult because of Spencer’s negativity.

After a few years of trying to make it work, Meredith decided to separate from Spencer, who spent most of his time playing video games or building cigar box ukuleles to sell.

• PEOPLE’s special edition True Crime Stories: 35 Real Cases That Inspired the Show Law & Order is on sale now.

Newly single, Meredith was able to host parties like she had done when she first was married, Vaga says.

“She just had a really positive energy,” Vaga says. “He would hold her back from doing so many . She was being a free spirit.”

The cookout and party Meredith hosted on Sunday was the first party she had hosted since her separation, says Vaga, who was invited but had to work.

Despite everything the couple had been through, Vaga says she knows Meredith was having a hard time with the divorce.

“That had to be hard for her, whether or not she was excited , it was hard. She loved him,” Vaga says.

Spencer’s father, Chester Hight, said his family is devastated by the shooting — grieving the deaths of his son, daughter-in-law and those killed at the party.

“I’m so sorry,” Chester said, according to CBS News. He told the Dallas Morning News, the family is living a “nightmare.”

Vaga says, “I just don’t think anyone deserves to go that way. I don’t understand it and probably none of us ever will.”

Meredith and Spencer’s families could not be reached for comment.


PEOPLE.com

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‘I was told I’d be fired because of migraines’

Employers are not good enough at supporting staff with migraines, say three UK charities.
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Rob Lowe and Sons Investigate the Paranormal Because Why TF Not

Rob Lowe talks about about hitting the road with his sons to search for monsters, aliens, and ghosts in The Lowe Files.
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Artists Defend Shakespeare In The Park, Because Political Theater Matters

“Such discussion is exactly the goal of our civically-engaged theater,” The Public declared.
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Kim K. Pairs A Crop Top With A Gorgeous Sheer Skirt, Because Of Course

It’s BARELY a crop top.
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Prepare For Some Grade-A Tantrums Because ‘Bridezillas’ Is Coming Back

No wedding guest is safe.
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Jumbo says black UK stars win US roles because ‘we are better’

The Good Fight star says the UK should stop letting talent ‘slip through the net’.
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Emily Ratajkowski’s “Blurred Lines” Debut Was Because of This Man

ESC: Trendsetters at Work, TreatsHe photographs some of the most beautiful (and most famous) women and men in the world.
Steve Shaw is the founder and creative director of Shaw & Co–a media company that’s home…

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Ed Sheeran Quits Twitter Because of Trolls

The "Shape of You" singer received major backlash when Lady Gaga fans thought he was throwing shade at Mother Monster. "Live From E!" weighs in on internet abuse.
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Just Because Rihanna Can Go Barefoot in the Airport Doesn’t Mean You Should

For decency and germs.

Lifestyle – Esquire

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Artists Defend Shakespeare In The Park, Because Political Theater Matters

As critics denounce a Trumped-up version of Shakespeare’s “Julius Caesar,” actors, writers and illustrators are pledging their support for one of New York City’s most beloved cultural attractions.

Every summer Shakespeare in the Park arrives in New York City, bringing with it free stagings of the Bard’s best works, sometimes updated to appeal to modern audiences flocking to Central Park to see a play.

This year, that was certainly the case. The Public theater’s update of “Julius Caesar,” Shakespeare’s famous play about the assassination of the titular Roman dictator, features a Trumped-up storyline in which Caesar, golden hair and all, wears a business suit instead of a toga. His wife Calpurnia dresses in silk and high heels, speaking with what’s been described as a “heavy Slavic accent.” An American flag can be seen waving onstage. 

The decision to infuse the story of Caesar with the spirit of today’s political mania ― to base the main character on U.S. President Donald Trump ― was a bold one. (Though hardly unprecedented; for example, a 2012 American Conservative article recounts a version of the play with an Obama-esque Caesar.) Bold because in the production, the leader of Rome is assassinated, stabbed to death by senators who felt his death would be best for their troubled republic. So in director Oskar Eustis’ rendition, a figure that looks an awful lot like Trump dies at the hands of ardent critics every night of the play’s run.

When Fox News and the corporations sponsoring The Public Theater caught wind of the death, they, still digesting the bloody antics of comedian Kathy Griffin, bridled. Delta and Bank of America pulled their support for the play. Appalled citizens made their opinions known on Twitter, threatening to boycott the free program.

While the outrage machine seemed to be throttling forward, a few famous artists, actors and writers took to social media to disrupt the current of negativity and defend Eustis and the staging of “Julius Caesar.” While some did so by simply pointing out the fact that detractors were largely misunderstanding the very essence of the play, others began rallying support for the theater by pledging to see the show and donate to The Public. 

New Yorker cartoonist Tom Toro promised to give those who donated more than $ 25 to The Public a free print of a themed illustration, which reads, “Just when you’re about to lose your faith in humanity, you see Shakespeare in the Park.” Actress Amber Tamblyn and author Joyce Carol Oates tweeted their intent to see “Julius Caesar” despite Delta’s lack of support. Others, like Nia Vardalos, shared links to The Public’s donation page.

While those strongly opposed to the “Julius Caesar” play have expressed that they don’t want their tax dollars used to fund what they have perceived as an anti-Trump artwork, the National Endowment for the Arts cleared up those concerns quickly: “No taxpayer dollars support Shakespeare in the Park’s production of ‘Julius Caesar,’” it announced in a statement.

And in response to those choosing to boycott The Public, a few individuals have in turn suggested boycotting corporations like Delta, who’ve pulled their support unwisely. 

“Maybe we should be less concerned that Shakespeare in the Park staged Caesar & more that Caesar calls Trump to mind?” author Celeste Ng tweeted. “Just a thought, @delta.”

Those familiar with Shakespeare’s centuries-old work know the playwright presents Caesar’s death as a disastrous event for Rome. The murder is similarly depicted in The Public’s production as an inarguable mistake on behalf of those American democrats who felt deposing of a tyrant through violence and illegal means was an act of patriotism.

“’Julius Caesar’ is about how fragile democracy is,” Eustis wrote in a statement about the play before it even opened. “The institutions that we have grown up with, that we have inherited from the struggle of many generations of our ancestors, can be swept away in no time at all.”

In a more recent statement from The Public Theater, the organization affirmed that it stands “completely behind our production of Julius Caesar. We recognize that our interpretation of the play has provoked heated discussion […] such discussion is exactly the goal of our civically-engaged theater; this discourse is the basis of a healthy democracy.”

The theater also reiterated that it in no way condones violence towards anyone. In fact, it makes the exact opposite point: “Those who attempt to defend democracy by undemocratic means pay a terrible price and destroy the very thing they are fighting to save.”

Julius Caesar is slated to run at Central Park’s Delacorte Theater until June 18 as part of New York’s Shakespeare in the Park festival. Tickets are free.

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Arts – The Huffington Post
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Lebanon Bans ‘Wonder Woman’ Screenings Because Of Israeli Star Gal Gadot

Despite its positive early reviews, and high rating on Rotten Tomatoes, people living in Lebanon won’t be able to see “Wonder Woman” in their theaters anytime soon. 

The film, starring Israel-born actress Gal Gadot, has officially been banned from screenings in the country, which is in a conflict with Israel, The Guardian reports. Gadot served in the Israeli Defense Force for two years and has publicly expressed support for the IDF.

Just hours before the ban went into effect, “Wonder Woman” was scheduled to premiere in Lebanon. Grand Cinemas, a Lebanese theater chain, announced the ban with a post on Twitter. 

“Wonder Woman” passed Lebanon’s screening procedures, The Guardian notes, but the government reportedly responded to pressure from the Campaign to Boycott Supporters of Israel-Lebanon to ban what they called “the Israeli Soldier film.” 

Interestingly, Gadot’s “Fast and Furious” films, as well as “Batman v Superman,” have screened in Lebanon, though The Campaign tried to have the latter banned. Films starring fellow Israel-born star Natalie Portman have also screened in Lebanon. 

“Wonder Woman” found itself in the middle of another controversy earlier this week when the Austin branch of the Alamo Drafthouse movie theater chain announced a women-only screening. Naturally, men responded with outrage. 

Despite the ban and controversy over the woman-only screening, Warner Bros. is expecting “Wonder Woman” to make a whopping $ 175 million debut at the box office. As of right now, the film also has a 95 percent rating (down from 96) on Rotten Tomatoes, putting it ahead of Marvel films like “Iron Man,” “The Avengers” and “Guardians of the Galaxy.”

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Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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Chris Pine Says Wonder Woman Is Good Because ‘Men Are Not All That Smart’

This is promising.

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Watch Dogs Play In The Mud Because It’s Too Darn Fun To Ignore

Dogs playing in the mud can be so amusing.

Even if you do have to wash them afterward, you can’t help but admire their ability to turn a quagmire into good, dirty fun.

CrazyFunnyStuff posted this compilation on Sunday. We hope these pooches have found more luck in the muck since then.

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We Pay Low Prices For Chinese Food Because Of Racial Biases About ‘Cheap’ Labor

You may not think it, but there’s a direct relationship between plunging your chopsticks into that white, quart-sized box of cheaply priced Chinese food — and a laborer diligently driving a spike to lay the railroad tracks that became the gateway to the American West. 

May, which is Asian Pacific American Heritage Month, marks the anniversary of the completion of the Transcontinental Railroad. It was largely built by Chinese immigrants from 1864 to 1869, working at a grueling pace for less money than white workers. And these labor practices have an impact today on how much we’re willing to pay for Chinese food ― rooted in a perception that Chinese labor is inherently “cheap,” historians say.

The earliest Chinese restaurants in America were created for Chinese railroad laborers, who were under contract and lacked negotiating power as they laid tracks from Omaha, Nebraska, to Sacramento, California ― cutting through the Rocky Mountains and the Sierra Nevada. With Chinese laborers earning an estimated two-thirds of what white workers made, owners had to keep restaurant prices low, Beatrice Chen, programming vice president at the Museum of Chinese in America, explained to HuffPost. 

The mainstream American consumer mindset is that there is a ceiling to how much we’re willing to pay for Chinese food.

“This perception of Chinese restaurants has stuck, even though high-end Chinese restaurants in Asia are common and popular,” Chen said. “The mainstream American consumer mindset is that there is a ceiling to how much we’re willing to pay for Chinese food, even if they are made with the same fresh ingredients and intricate cooking techniques as say, French or Japanese cuisine.”

‘Cheap Labor’ And ‘Job Stealers’

The railroad also laid the foundation for perceptions of Chinese people themselves. White workers at the time were unionizing, and were less willing to work for lower wages. Railroad executives had been skeptical of the aptitude of Chinese workers, but the laborers set out to prove them wrong, Chen explained.

“This led to the general perception that Chinese were willing to work for lower wages and were job stealers,” she said. 

But what was perceived as a robotic work ethic might have just been survival, Beth Lew-Williams, an assistant professor at Princeton specializing in Asian American history, told HuffPost in an interview in December. She pointed out a discriminatory labor system within the railroad. 

Chinese were paid less, given the worst strenuous jobs. People against the Chinese saw this as revealing of their innate nature.

“It was a race-based dual wage system at the time,” Lew-Williams said. “Chinese were paid less, given the worst strenuous jobs. People against the Chinese saw this as revealing of their innate nature. That Chinese were fundamentally ‘cheap’ labor and designed to do this back-breaking labor.”

On top of negative perceptions, Chinese contributions were largely erased through history. Chen said that of the 17,000 railroad workers, 15,000 were Chinese, though estimates vary. A photo below of the final stake being driven into the track at Promontory Summit, Utah, would have people believe they didn’t contribute at all.

“I hope that telling and disseminating American history told from Asian American perspectives will illuminate that Asian Americans are not necessarily quiet (per the stereotype), but rather, Asian American history/stories and perspectives tend to be silenced in the mainstream,” Chen said. 

Building A Railroad, And Then Banned

Following completion of the tracks, the U.S. implemented the Chinese Exclusion Act of 1882, stemming further immigration of Chinese laborers. It was the first major law that banned a group’s immigration to the U.S. based on ethnicity.

“The Chinese were originally seen as racially unassimilable,” Lew-Williams said. “They could not become Americanized. They were simultaneously racially inferior, backwards, savage heathen ― and in some dangerous ways ― superior.”

The act was technically repealed on Dec. 17, 1943, allowing 105 Chinese visas per year. The measure was largely seen as an attempt to maintain U.S.-China relationships against Japan during World War II.

In 1965, the Immigration and Nationality Act fully reversed exclusionary practices, which some historians say was meant to prop up Asians as the “model minority” during the Civil Rights movement ― sending a message to other minority groups. 

An Immigrant Story For Today 

Much has been written about the dangers in grouping together Asian Americans as a model minority monolith and erasing the experiences of immigrants. Peter Kwong, a former Asian American studies professor at Hunter College, pointed out that the struggles of the original Chinese Americans have persisted.

“Because some Chinese people succeeded doesn’t mean working-class Chinese have the same capability and upward mobility. It’s a class issue,” Kwong told HuffPost in an interview before he died in March.  

It may be that food is the easiest lens through which to view such thorny topics as class, race, social mobility and how much value we place on a given culture. 

If you take price as a surrogate for prestige … there are some cuisines we are willing to pay for and some we are not willing to pay for, and that is related partly, I think, to how we evaluate those national cultures and their people.

Krishnendu Ray, a professor of food studies at New York University, has written about the topic, and said that we might simply hold less veneration for food from certain countries that we see as less well-off. 

“If you take price as a surrogate for prestige … there are some cuisines we are willing to pay for and some we are not willing to pay for, and that is related partly, I think, to how we evaluate those national cultures and their people,” Ray said in Voice of America. 

Eddie Huang, owner of Baohaus and a host on Vice, often talks about how mainstream appreciation of food and culture remain a barometer for how conditional your status is as a foreigner, and of your stock value in America. 

Huang has expressed dismay that immigrants like his parents feel they have to work harder just to achieve the same pay as non-immigrants. And thumbing his nose to any such established expectation, Huang has said in the past

“I sell Taiwanese gua bao for a full f**king price in America.”  

Read more from HuffPost on Asian Pacific American Heritage Month. 

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Ex-Lawmaker Says Katy Perry Is ‘Ruled By Satan’ Because She’s Kissed A Girl

Katy Perry delivered a powerful speech at the Human Rights Campaign’s annual gala in Los Angeles last month, where she opened up about her sexuality and recalled her early years in a conservative Christian environment in which “homosexuality was synonymous with the word abomination.” 

Picking up HRC’s National Equality Award, the singer nodded to the real-life experience that inspired one of her biggest hits, noting, “I kissed a girl and I liked it. Truth be told, I did more than that.” At first, she attempted to “pray the gay away at my Jesus camps,” but eventually discovered that the LGBTQ community was made up of “the most free, strong, kind and inclusive people I have ever met.”

Perry’s candid remarks have drawn national praise, but one former Colorado legislator believes the singer’s speech is evidence that she is “ruled by Satan.”

Gordon Klingenschmitt, who was elected to the Colorado House of Representatives in 2014 but failed in his state Senate bid last year, blasted Perry on the April 9 installment of his “Pray In Jesus Name” radio program, Right Wing Watch reported

“You don’t just need more of your Jesus camps, more of the Bible, more of what your parents told you,” Klingenschmitt said on his program, a clip of which can be viewed above. “You need to get the devil out of you.” He then offered a prayer for Perry, noting, “We pray that she will be saved, that she will be born again, that she will repent of her sin and stop promoting sin to young people.” 

As far as anti-LGBTQ statements are concerned, however, Klingenschmitt is a repeat offender. In December, he cited an inclusive Zales Jewelers holiday commercial as evidence of a “demonic spirit” who had inhabited the advertising executives who had created the ad. 

He also blasted the Boy Scouts of America for “thumbing their nose at God” in 2015 for promoting “homosexual men to mentoring and camping with your boys” after the scouting organization lifted a controversial ban on openly gay adult participants

Was Perry’s speech really worthy of this brouhaha? Watch an excerpt below and decide for yourself. 

For the latest in LGBTQ entertainment, check out the Queer Voices newsletter. 

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Firefighters have higher heart attack risk ‘because of heat’

Research links the heat faced by firefighters with a greater risk of suffering a heart attack.
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Kiernan Shipka Should Definitely Win Prom Queen Because of This Dress

ESC: Kiernan ShipkaKiernan Shipka is giving us major prom vibes in this gorgeous, floral Rosie Assoulin number.
And because it’s just about that time to start brainstorming what you’ll be wearing…

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Shop These 9 Draper James Looks (Because It’s Reese Witherspoon’s Birthday)

ESC: Reese WitherspoonOn and off the screen, Reese Witherspoon nails polished, preppy style.
So, in honor of the actress’ 41st birthday, we’re celebrating the Academy Award-winner’s ladylike…

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Saturday Savings: Alicia Keys’ Rad Necklace Is Up for Grabs (Because It’s on Sale)

ESC: Alicia Keys, Saturday SavingsAlicia Keys shut down Houston the other night, and it wasn’t just because of her pipes.
The Voice judge wore an incredible, armor-like Dannijo bib necklace (which is on sale!) and…

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Here’s A Toad Wearing A Top Hat, Because What Else Do You Have Going On?

Chris Newsome, a 43-year-old from Alabama, knows how to make an amphibian feel fancy.

This past summer, a toad took up residence in Newsome’s flowerbed and would visit his porch every night.

Not only did Newsome decide to give his guest a proper name — Mr. Toad — he also decided to start making hats for the little critter in the hopes of making another small fry happy.

“I made hats to cheer up a friend’s son after his pet toad died,” Newsome told The Huffington Post. “He asked if my porch toad was still around, so I put some pictures of the toad with hats on Facebook to make him laugh.”

Newsome fashioned the hats out of foam paper, which he said seemed like “toad-friendly material.”

They’re also pretty small — perfect for a toad, but quite silly-looking on Newsome’s dog, Daisy, who is wearing the hat below for scale:

Newsome also told HuffPost that it seemed Mr. Toad wasn’t bothered by modeling the hats, either.

“Even after many hats and pictures, he still returned,” Newsome said. “Either he liked the hats or he couldn’t be fazed.”

Recently, Newsome decided to post the pictures of Mr. Toad working it in his fab hats on Reddit and the pictures soon went viral, receiving more than 1.1 million views.

“Hopefully, it or another toad will visit once the weather warms up,” Newsome said.

Here’s hopping that happens!

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Style – The Huffington Post
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Wrestler Brie Bella on Hoping for a ‘Natural’ Childbirth: ‘I Know I Can Stand Pain Because of My Career’

Brie Bella is well-versed when it comes to enduring physical stress on her body, but she understands that carrying a child — and giving birth — are a different story.

“Everyone can tell you what pregnancy feels like, but it will still be new to you,” the WWE Divas Champion tells Fit Pregnancy and Baby for its April cover story. “I’m preparing for a natural birth. I hope I can stick with that, but obviously I’m open to medical help if need be.”

Bella, 33, isn’t worried about being uncomfortable, though — and her reason why makes a lot of sense.

“I know I can stand pain because of my career,” says the Total Divas star, who has retired from the ring for the time being to focus on motherhood. “Childbirth is going to be more painful than wrestling, but I know I will survive.”

Want all the latest pregnancy and birth announcements, plus celebrity mom blogs? Click here to get those and more in the PEOPLE Babies newsletter.

Bella and husband Daniel Bryan are expecting a daughter this spring, whom they plan to name Birdy Joe. And the story behind her parents’ choice of moniker is a sweet one.

“Joe, her middle name, is after my grandfather — his name was Joseph, and he meant the world to me,” she shares. “Birdy is because my husband and his whole family are B’s. And he married me, a B too, so his one request was that our kids have B names.”

Adds Bella, “I didn’t realize how hard it was to find girl B names, but we both came across Birdy and knew that was it!”

FROM COINAGE: 4 Ways to Work Out Without Killing Your Wallet

 

The secret to getting pregnant for Bella and Bryan (aside from the obvious)? Stop obsessing over it.

“You spend your adult life trying not to get pregnant, so I thought having it happen would be immediate,” she says. “But for a couple of months I’d be late and think I felt signs and then turn out not to be pregnant.”

“Sure enough, when we took one month off from trying and stopped the ovulation tests, it all worked out,” the mama-to-be adds. “I think my body was telling me, ‘It’s time.’

Brie Bella Is Pregnant with Her First Child!

 

Aside from her flexible birth plan, Bella is focusing on what comes after — namely, breastfeeding — and willing herself to allow time for herself and Birdy to find a rhythm.

“I’ve talked to friends; they’ve all had issues with their baby not latching on right away,” she explains. “You concentrate so much on the birthing part that sometimes you forget the important parts that come once the baby arrives.”

“I’ll remind myself to be patient,” she continues. “I feel breastfeeding creates a special bond with your baby. The fact that you can feed your child with your body is the most fascinating thing in the world to me.”


PEOPLE.com

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Jessica Biel Says She Eats In The Shower Because #MomLife

Back in October, Jessica Biel shared an unusual Instagram post that resonated with a lot of moms.

The actress posted a photo of a plate, fork and cup of coffee in the shower. “Yes. I eat in the shower. I admit it,” she wrote in the caption, along with the hashtag #ShowerEats.

The post elicited a lot of responses from her fellow parents, who commented that they engage in similar multitasking stunts.

Yes. I eat in the shower. I admit it. Chicken apple sausage and espresso. Try it. I dare you. #ShowerEats

A photo posted by Jessica Biel (@jessicabiel) on

Appearing on “The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon” on Thursday, the actress elaborated on her Instagram post and got real about parenting.

“You eat in the shower?” Fallon asked her.

“This is just mom life,” she replied.

Biel and her husband Justin Timberlake are parents to a son named Silas, who turns 2 in April. It seems that being a parent has helped the actress refine her multitasking skills.

“I don’t know if anybody else does this,” Biel said of her shower meals. “I do not have time for anything. I’m feeding him in the morning, trying to get ready and I realize I haven’t eaten. I just take it into the shower.”

She added, “Sometimes its a huge success. Sometimes it’s a huge failure.”

Biel also mimed to demonstrate how she eats while showering and cautioned that it works well with foods like sausage or cereal but not with sandwiches.

“You should try it!” she told Fallon.

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Is It Angels Who Protect Social Entrepreneurs? Because Nobody Else Does…..

“Four corners to my bed

Four Angels round my head

One to watch, one to pray,

And two to take all fears away!”

When I was a child I would recite this rhyme before going to bed. Those were the days when we would sleep beneath the stars. Sometimes clouds and trees would take menacing shapes in the dark. I would shut my eyes tightly and think of the Angels protecting me and be comforted and drift into sleep.

Now it seems the Angels are back again.

Life was tough indeed when I took a conscious decision to establish Operation ASHA. My aim was clear- that of providing health solutions to the poorest of the poor. Suddenly life changed. From a successful doctor in an upscale fancy private hospital I became a foot soldier trudging long miles in shanty towns and villages. My appearance changed. I went from stiletto heels to sturdy walking shoes. I started looking unkempt and shabby, initially a deliberately cultivated look to be accepted by those whom I serve, and later a natural consequence of the kind of work I was doing.

People around me changed too. Many laughed. All were contemptuous. Most couldn’t understand why I would throw away a good income to start an NGO. Others accused me of exactly the opposite thing- of being desperate to make easy money, for isn’t that the reason why one starts an NGO in the first place? With two conflicting accusations being hurled at me at the same time, I wouldn’t know whether I was standing on my head or my heels.

And as for the uncertainty! The less I write about it the better. Words are not enough to describe the trials and tribulations I went through. Starting a social venture is bad enough, starting it without a sound financial plan to ensure sustainability is the height of absurdity. And putting your own savings in a social enterprise is the biggest financial folly one could ever commit. I thought my savings would last 5 years. They finished in one, like water trickling from a hole in a bucket. I had plunged headlong into choppy waters without the fear of drowning. Each day I managed to stay afloat was a miracle.

When you are a social entrepreneur, life is all about extremes. You swing from one end on the pendulum to the other. From the depths of despair you go to such euphoria that you are walking with your head in the clouds. There are days when everything goes wrong. You get sleepless nights wondering where the next round of funding is coming from, your best guy has been offered twice the salary by a rival foundation, and some government officer somewhere has absolutely refused to let you work in his fiefdom. Other days- you wake up and find yourself on top of the world for someone somewhere has recognised your work and your worth. One day you are accused of being a crook and a thief, next day, blasphemously, you are feted by the media as the next Mother Teresa. In 2014, the Schwab Foundation and the World Economic Forum selected me as Social Entrepreneur of the Year. I found myself rubbing shoulders with the Who’s Who of society and the hoi-polloi at Davos. I haven’t looked back since then.

But at all times there is an all-pervading undercurrent of anxiety. Social entrepreneurs thrive on the adrenalin rush created by the see-saw that is life. You may be fully sustainable, yet you can’t get over the feeling that you are like the wandering mendicants of yesteryears with a staff in one hand and a begging bowl in the other.

In this topsy-turvy world, few things happen to keep you going. Patients recover. Results are there for you to see. Children get back to school. Treated TB patients get back their jobs, and there’s money for food and to spare. Miraculously, funds start coming in time. Those that scoffed at you and laughed with derision give tolerant smiles. There’s an occasional pat on the back, a kind word. You go to bed happy and contented and you sleep well, for the Angels are back and hovering over you. And you know they are there for you and will protect you as they have done since childhood. For nobody else will.

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Malia Obama Was An ‘Angel’ Intern For ‘Girls’ Because Of Course

Oh, to have Malia Obama as your intern. 

Lena Dunham and “Girls” showrunner Jenni Konner sat down with Howard Stern for an interview on his SiriusXM show Monday and talked about how they had the privilege of working with the 18-year-old former First Daughter on the set of their HBO series back in the summer of 2015. 

“She’s an angel,” Dunham said. “She was interested and she was interning at HBO and they thought, you know, what if she comes a couple days a week to the set of ‘Girls.’ She loved the show. Obviously we weren’t making her go get our coffee, but she wanted to do all the jobs, that was the cool thing. She was totally enthusiastic.”  

Yes, the Secret Service was around. No, Malia was not on set for the filming of any sex scenes. And she’s as smart as you’d think.

“She’s such a delight. You cannot believe how poised and incredible she is,” Konner said. Malia, they said, worked a job similar to a writer’s assistant, training to take down the improv to use in subsequent shots. 

Malia’s latest gig is an internship with film producer Harvey Weinstein at the Weinstein Company’s New York office. The teen, who wants to become a filmmaker and is taking a gap year before beginning Harvard University in the fall, is set to start her Weinstein internship this month, and will be working in the marketing or development department, according to The Hollywood Reporter. 

Who run the world? 

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‘Star Wars’ Is Pretty Much Happening In Real Life Because Beyoncé Is Pregnant With Twins

It was Oscar Wilde who said, “Life imitates art far more than art imitates life.” And right now, the basic plot of “Star Wars” is pretty much happening in real life because Donald Trump is president and Beyoncé is pregnant with twins. 

 Look, it just works: 

It's Star Wars, people!

A photo posted by The Daily Show (@thedailyshow) on

If you need that spelled out for you, just like the fictional Queen Padmé Amidala, our Queen Bey is carrying the twin and future rebels who will one day save us from the Dark Side. 

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Khloe Kardashian Recalls Feeling Embarrassed to Make Eye Contact in Public Because of Her Weight on Revenge Body

Khloe Kardashian, Revenge Body 102Khloe Kardashian has been there.
In this emotional scene from tomorrow’s all-new episode of Revenge Body With Khloe Kardashian, new participant Samantha McCord shares she often…

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Girl Meets World Couldn’t Get as Dramatic as the Original Because of Disney Channel, According to Rider Strong

Girl Meets WorldShawn Hunter has a lot on his mind. In a new interview, Rider Strong of Boy Meets World fame got candid about the differences between the ABC series he starred on and the spinoff, Girl Meets…

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Ballet dancer says she’s losing job because she’s too tall

PHILADELPHIA (AP) — A 5-foot-11 dancer who performed as the Sugar Plum Fairy in the Pennsylvania Ballet’s Nutcracker this season says she’s being dropped from the company because she’s too tall.
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Mormon Tabernacle Choir Singer Resigns Because Trump Reminds Her Of Hitler

A member of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir has resigned in protest over the group’s upcoming performance at Donald Trump’s inauguration, saying she could “never look [herself] in the mirror again” if she sang for the president-elect ― a man she likens to Adolf Hitler.

In a letter sent to the choir and later posted on Facebook, Jan Chamberlin explained that she has “spent several sleepless nights and days in turmoil and agony,” reflecting, praying and searching her soul.

“I’ve tried to tell myself that it will be alright and that I can continue in good conscience before God and man,” she wrote. “But it’s no use. I simply cannot continue with the recent turn of events. I could never look myself in the mirror again with self respect.”

By performing at the Jan. 20 ceremony, Chamberlin said, the choir will create the impression that it’s “endorsing tyranny and facism [sic].” 

Chamberlin went on to compare the incoming president to the leader of Nazi Germany.

“History is repeating itself; the same tactics are being used by Hitler (identify a problem, finding a scapegoat target to blame, and stirring up people with a combination of fanaticism, false promises, and fear, and gathering the funding),” she wrote. 

“I only know I could never ‘throw roses to Hitler.’ And I certainly could never sing for him.”

More than 200 of the choir’s 360 members are expected to perform at Trump’s inauguration, church officials earlier told The Salt Lake City Tribune.

But Chamberlin is not alone in her distress. Randall Thacker, a lifelong Mormon, launched a petition urging the choir not to perform for an “incoming president who has demonstrated sexist, racist, misogynistic, and xenophobic behavior that does not align with the principles and teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.”

As of Friday, the petition had topped 24,000 signatures

Chamberlin concluded her lengthy letter thus: “My heart is shattered and broken … but my conscience is clear. And THAT, really is all that matters.”

Todd Starnes of Fox News blasted Chamberlin’s post on Friday, noting that choir members’ participation in the inauguration is strictly voluntary and describing her Hitler comparison as “not only intellectually dishonest ― it’s downright repulsive.”

Trump’s transition team has struggled to find performers for his inauguration. The Rockettes are scheduled to perform, but one member of the famed dance company has also spoken out. She told Marie Claire, “This is making our show, our job, our name, branded as right-wing. An extreme right-wing.”

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Holiday Dresses: Because You Can’t Wear Just Anything to the Office Party

ESC: Holiday Party DressesThe office holiday party: A time to let loose with your co-workers, celebrate successes and have some fun.
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‘I’m Scared About Remarrying Because Married Women Stop Wanting Sex’

Reader I Have Clients Just Like This Guy writes,

I am a 43 yr old male, one year separated from my wife and 4 children (17 girl, 14 girl, 12 boy, 10 boy). I have always been fit and active, own a thriving business and live a mostly family centered life (read: I really enjoy doing stuff with my kids).  The ex and I met in high school, and have been together ever since.  As much as it pains me to be truthful about this, we are getting a divorce because I came to the conclusion a couple years ago that sex would never again be remotely satisfying or frequent with her. It had gotten so I had difficulty finishing sex with an orgasm – and this from a guy who could finish in 90 seconds or less when we first met!

Of course, since the separation, she has reclaimed her sexy self, lost 30lbs, rediscovered makeup and fashion, and generally become someone I would once again consider dating. Except that I won’t. I don’t trust any of it. In fact, I think her sexy new self would last about 6 months before the effects of monotogamy (good one!) set in again.

And here comes the best part. After reading your blog (thanks, you are fantastic, I am a fan), I am unsure I want to be in a committed relationship with ANY normal woman. I mean really, it sounds just awful!  For me, a healthy love life is crucial to a happy relationship. Let me repeat this for clarity: I don’t think I can ever be happy in a relationship without a robust and healthy sexual component. This. Is. Not. Negotiable.

And I’m not even going to be so ambitious as to ask for oral, anal, or whatever other delights are making my fellow men feel neglected in their absence. I am happy to settle for normal, connected, intimate lovin. Bonus points if she ain’t fat.

I have plenty of opportunity to date….if I want. Hell, it’s like shooting fish in a barrel compared to the last time I was in the dating pool 25 years ago. But geez already, it is really discouraging to think that a year or two into a new relationship, I will be disappointed and unhappy once again. And to make it worse, I can’t think of a single married friend of mine who is happy with his marital sex life.

So my question for you is: What’s a guy to do?

never again?

Well, IHCJLTG, as the moniker I gave you indicates, you are in a fairly common predicament.  I have many male clients who get out of sexless or low sex marriages, and get back onto the mid-40’s or 50’s dating scene, finding that it is indeed like shooting fish in a barrel, as you so sensitively phrased it.  Women go nuts for men who like kids and who look presentable, because a lot of them just got out of marriages with guys that let themselves go the same way as you feel that your wife let herself go.  So then these newly single guys have a lot of sex, and they find someone they want to be more serious, and then they get cold feet, because after all, they are smart guys, and they read things like my blog (thanks for reading, by the way!), and they know what’s what, namely, that women will not continue to be as hot to trot after a couple years into the relationship.

Here are my thoughts on your dilemma.

1. You met your wife when she was extremely young.  She had no earthly idea what marriage would be like, nevermind being married with 4 kids.  She could not have possibly known how she would feel about sex, touching, communication, or anything in her 20’s, 30’s, or 40’s.  However, if you met a woman now, who is around your own age, this would not be an issue.  Women around 40 know themselves way, way better than teenagers do, obviously.  If you made it clear to your 16 year old girlfriend that you wanted regular sex forever, of course she said yes and assumed she would want it too.  If you make it clear to a 40 year old girlfriend that you want regular sex forever, she would know herself well enough to tell you whether she thinks this is possible for her.  It is not her first rodeo.

2. Do not overgeneralize from my articles.  There are plenty of people who have regular sex, once or twice weekly, for the majority of the years they are married.  But, even for these people, they still have to put effort in to get in the mood for sex.

3. As I discussed with my awesome Functional Couple, Gail and Jason, people are often a lot more motivated to make things work in their second marriages versus their first.  If you’re divorced once, it could have been just the stars aligning poorly, but if you divorce twice, you kind of have to look inward.  So many people will work harder on marriage #2.  Which in your potential case would mean, you’d try to be more loving, appreciative, and say less stuff with what I believe may be your trademark sarcastic style, and your wife would try to get herself in the mood for more frequent lovemaking than she might otherwise yearn for.

4. You are newly single and drunk on your power to have sex with many women.  Soon this excitement may fade (for real) and you may want someone to discuss current events with, or take to family functions, or who likes running, or The Daily Show, or whatever else you like.  You may want a loving long term companion EVEN MORE than you want hot hot hot sex forever.  So you may decide that the best way to go is to put your faith in a woman who tells you that your happiness is important enough to her that she will commit to trying to keep your sex life interesting for the long haul.

5. I have no idea what happened within your marriage but it always takes two to tango.  She could very well have let herself go and stopped caring about sex, but I am willing to wager that she did not always think of you as a cross between Mr. Big, Dylan McKay, and James Bond (you may have to google the first two but you get my drift).  You may have to do some soul searching as to why your ex-wife so selfishly insisted on turning into a fat sexless blob.  Something tells me she may have been unhappy in the marriage too.  So you’re going to have to be the best partner you can be if you want a woman to WANT to keep things hot forever.

6. If you do decide that re-marrying isn’t for you, then keep in mind you yourself will not be hot forever either.  A fit attractive 43 year old man can sleep with many woman.  A fit attractive 50 year old man less so.  And by 60, nope.  Also, we have no idea if you’ll even be that into sex anymore in 10, 15, or 20 years.  Testosterone decreases for men around then and can be a big wake up call for guys who have previously defined themselves by their raging sex drives and morning erections.  Your worldview may change at that point, and you’ll be less appealing to the majority of women, so keep that in mind now when turning down women who want to date you.

7. Men who are happy with their sex lives and who are around your age, are, from my clinical experience, fairly unlikely to talk openly about it to other guys.  They know the score, that the average guy isn’t supposed to be sexually satisfied within marriage, so they aren’t going to brag if they are because it’s (1) mean, and (2) not very gentlemanly to share intimate details about their wives.  So don’t take everything you hear from your friends as gospel.  And honestly the guys who are getting a lot of sex are usually not the ones who are going to poker nights and ballgames with the guys and so forth.  They are usually getting a lot of sex because their asses are home at night taking care of their kids and having conversations with their wives.  So your sample group may be biased purely because it’s based on guys who have enough extra time to sit around and shoot the shit with you. Again, this is both my clinical and anecdotal experience so DON’T SEND ME HATE MAIL THAT YOU HAVE LOADS OF SEX AND ALSO GET TO GO OUT WITH THE GUYS FIVE NIGHTS OUT OF SEVEN.  SAVE THE TIME YOU’D BE SENDING ME HATE MAIL AND GO MAKE OUT WITH YOUR AWESOME WIFE.  So my point is, the more nights per week a guy is home, the more sex he’s getting AND the less likely you are to hear about it by virtue of the fact that you don’t get to spend time with this guy because he’s busy either being at home or having sex.

8. You could finish in 90 seconds or less because you were probably 16!  Did you try to keep the passion alive with your wife?  Did you ask why she didn’t like sex and what you could do to turn her on?  Did you ask what her fantasies were, did you try to read erotic stories with her, did you get overnight sitters for the kids, did you write her love letters, did you text her in the middle of the day to tell her you were thinking about her?  You may say yes, or, more likely, you may say you used to but you stopped when she still didn’t give you the time of day.  Well there are ebbs and flows and peaks and valleys in marriages. Your wife pushed four kids out of her vagina within 7 years!  She was tired as hell.  You don’t know, maybe if you hadn’t divorced her, and were loving, attentive, and looked in at yourself with a critical eye as to what you could change to improve things yourself, she would have dropped her 30 lbs and started putting mascara on again anyway!

9. I am not trying to be harsh with you. I feel for you.  But I think that you’re oversimplifying relationships.  So here are the take home points to mull over, as you click through Match.com and bubble over with delight at all the hot 30 year old women who are asking you on dates:

a. Are you focused on becoming the best partner you could be, that would make a woman want to work on keeping sex hot forever?

b. Do you have the patience to weather ups and downs in a woman’s sexual drive without catastrophizing that sex is completely over now because she didn’t want it in a week?

c. Are you looking deeply into what you could do to keep romance and connection alive forever, e.g. communication, empathy, validation, surprises, warmth, affection?

d. Do you know that a relationship takes work and no aspect of it, especially not sex, will just keep going, “naturally,” over time without you focusing on it?  But do you also know that if you work on a relationship, the closeness you achieve will make your sex much more awesome, close, and intimate than sex with random women you meet?  (For real, it’s not just me that thinks this; most male clients I have think their best sexual experiences were within relationships versus one night stands.)

If the answers are yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes, then I urge you to reconsider.  You may be able to find a great woman who is as committed to all facets of a relationship (one being SEX) as you.  Then, with work, you’ll have the best of both worlds: sex, and love.

Till we meet again, I remain, The Blogapist Who Wants This Guy To Find His High Sex Drive Love And Treat Her Right.

This post was originally published here on Dr. Psych Mom. Follow Dr. Rodman on Dr. Psych Mom, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest.

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Learn about Dr. Rodman’s private practice, including therapy, coaching, and consultation, here. This blog is not intended as diagnosis, assessment, or treatment, and should not replace consultation with your medical provider.

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19 Snowy Wedding Photos Because Baby, It’s Cold Outside

The weather outside is frightful, but it sure is pretty!

With December in full swing, it’s time to embrace the season and take advantage of the stunning snowscapes winter has to offer. Below, 19 wintry wedding pics with plenty of love to keep you warm. 

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The Rules of Life are Unpublished Because They are Constantly Changing

How and why are the rules of life constantly changing? originally appeared on Quorathe knowledge sharing network where compelling questions are answered by people with unique insights.

Answer by Dave Consiglio, Chemistry and Physics High School Teacher and Community College Professor, on Quora:

The rules of life are constantly changing because the environment in which life exists is constantly changing.

Many millions of years ago, our ancestors lived in trees in what is now central Africa. Life was good. Fruit was abundant. Predators lived on the ground (mostly), and we were pretty brainy and communicative and these could be easily avoided.

But then the rules changed.

Shifts in climate dried out our environment and forests receded. Grasslands emerged, and our lives became chaotic. We had two options: follow the trees or adapt to the grass.

Some of our ancestors did not adapt. They moved with the forests, staying where life didn’t change much. And they, consequently, didn’t change much. We call them chimpanzees and bonobos today, and there they are, living in what is left of the forests of Africa.

But others adapted. Evolutionary pressures favored upright walking, tool use, bigger brains, the ability to communicate, opposable thumbs, etc. These traits passed on, and others were lost. But every day was different. Species rose and fell, weather and climate changed, relationships between individuals were changed. We were faced with a perpetual race to keep up with the changes around us.

And we still are.

Success today depends on the ability to deal with 2016 life. But 2017 life will be slightly different, and new skills will be heavily favored.

30 years ago, my mother insisted that I learn to type. I have been enormously grateful for this skill. But there will come a time when it is not needed, having been replaced by something better.

The rules of life are always changing because the world is always changing. Tomorrow will be different than today, and so you must be different to succeed.

Prepare to change.

This question originally appeared on Quora – the knowledge sharing network where compelling questions are answered by people with unique insights. You can follow Quora on Twitter, Facebook, and Google+. More questions:

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Jessie James Decker Says Tom Brady Is Picked on “Because He’s Hot”

Jessie James Decker, Eric Decker, tom BradyTom Brady is one heck of a handsome guy, and Jessie James Decker believes that’s his Achilles heel.
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Kendall Jenner Takes a Stroll Through a Burning Forest Because It’s Christmas

The final day of the Love Advent calendar.

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I Work With Elders Because I Am Selfish

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When I was 21 I left the beach towns of Florida I had always called home, packed up a station wagon and headed to the millennial’s promised land, Brooklyn. Before I left, a friend and mentor recommended that I read Ayn Rand’s The Fountainhead. This quote by the main character struck me and changed my perspective and eventually my course in life:

“I don’t intend to build in order to have clients; I intend to have clients in order to build.”

I wanted to live my life in this way although I had not yet defined my passion. In Brooklyn I worked in film and learned about life. At 25 I made another move across country and then suffered a loss, which turned me inward and searching again for my calling. I realized my passion was other people’s passions, or what is called vocation, and this lead me to pursue a certification in life coaching and a graduate degree in psychology.

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In my studies I remained passionate about vocation. I was intrigued by my geropsychology class. I thought, “What better way to learn about life than in hindsight?” and assumed working with elders would offer me a perspective which my 20-something years had not yet granted me. I found an elder care community, which was rare in that it offered psychotherapy, and applied to do my clinical hours there. As I began my training I learned that many of the elders I was working with had a diagnosis of dementia. The site I trained at prided themselves on taking elders who have been told by other communities that they could not meet their needs; usually these “needs” were behavioral expressions. So there I was, selfishly thinking I would sit with elders for my hours and hear their stories and learn about ways to get by in this world: which mistakes are to be avoided, which opportunities to be taken. I would be there like a sponge soaking up their stories, tallying the details and using them to help myself and future clients figure out life. I had always been good at figuring things out and I was excited for the possibility of a life hack through being with elders.

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My clients were not what I expected: Very few remembered my name and conversations were often hard to start and even harder to follow. My clients did not come and sit across from me, instead I joined them in their world and their life. Elders were not the founts of knowledge on a life lived perfectly that I had imagined. Many were mad, frustrated, sad and bored; these common human conditions were exacerbated by years and circumstance. As I spent more and more time with this community my pretense started to fall away and, with a curiosity that has been my constant companion, I looked for what was present. I started to see how relationships were developed without being able to remember one’s name or the details of interactions. As one elder put it, “I do not remember you here [pointing at their head], but I know you here [pointing at their heart].”

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I began to notice elders who seemed to be more at peace with their life and those who were more fraught with suffering. I started to notice patterns of those who were aging more joyously than others, with less suffering. I noticed that those who rejected the process of aging were suffering more than those that embraced it. The life hack I got was not the one I expected. There is no short cut or easy answer but there is a perspective shift that can help us as we age. Throughout our life we can listen to our inner wisdom and our calling and follow it, we can act in our own rational self-interest and prepare for old age rather than try to avoid it and we can learn to know things not only with our minds but with our hearts and bodies as well.

I work with elders because I am selfish: I want to limit my own suffering in old age, and hopefully others’ along the way. I am open and actively learning from elders and the aging process. I encourage anyone who has the opportunity to be around elders to try this perspective on, and learn from elders who age joyously. When we let go of trying to stop aging, that energy can go into being in the moment and appreciating the process.

HuffPost’s GPS for the Soul app is based on two truths about human beings. First: We all have a centered place of wisdom, harmony and balance within us. Second: We’re all going to veer away from that place, again and again and again. What we need is a great course-correcting mechanism — a GPS for the Soul — to help us find our way back to that centered place, from which everything is possible.

Because no one knows better than you what helps you de-stress and tap into that place of peace inside yourself, it’s important for you to create your very own GPS guide — a personalized collection of whatever helps you course-correct. Email us at GPS@huffingtonpost.com and we’ll set you up with your very own HuffPost blogger account to share your guide on the site. If you’re already a blogger, we encourage you to upload your personal guide today. We can’t wait to see what you have to share.

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GPS for the Soul – The Huffington Post
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Jay Z Sings Along To Beyoncé During Her Made In America Show Because That’s What Love Is

Just when you thought Beyoncé and Jay Z’s love couldn’t get any sweeter, it does. 

The superstar performed at her husband’s Made in America Festival on the Rocky Stage in front of a sold-out crowd on Philadelphia’s Benjamin Franklin Parkway Saturday. In a sea of 80,000 people, one person stood out: Jay Z.

The rapper was spotted by other concertgoers wearing a hooded sweatshirt and singing along as his wife slayed on stage

Sigh. Bey and Jay forever. <3 

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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Harry Styles Falls Again Because It’s The Story Of His Life

Reuniting his butt with the floor once again, Harry Styles took another tumble at a concert in Toronto on Thursday.

It’s just the latest chapter in Style’s epic battle against gravity, which seems to have been going on for a while now:

Recently, during a time we assume he wasn’t falling to the seat of his pants, Styles and One Direction released the video for their new single. It’s called “Drag Me Down.”

Yeah, “Drag Me Down.” Has there ever been a more appropriate song title in the history of music?

Image: Tumblr

Doubt it.

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Madewell Is Recalling Several Sandal Styles Because of a Safety Issue

Important news if you bought sandals from Madewell’s Sightseer collection in the past six months: The company is recalling 50,900 pairs in the U.S. and Canada because of a safety issue.

According to WWD, the brand’s shoes from the Sightseer collection, sold between February and July 2015, “have been found to pose a hazard because the metal shank can dislodge and break through the bottom of the outsole, posing a risk of falling,” according to the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission. No injuries have been reported.

The sandals were sold at Madewell stores, online at madewell.com, or online at shopbop.com, from $ 60 to $ 80.

Specific styles include:

  • C0275 Sightseer Knotted Slide Sandals
  • C0276 Sightseer T-Strap Thong Sandals in Black Leather
  • C0277 Sightseer T-Strap Thong Sandals in Metallic Color-Block
  • C0278 Sightseer Buckle Gladiator Sandals
  • C0279 Sightseer Slide Sandals
  • C1105 Sightseer Crisscross Sandals
  • C5893 Sightseer T-Strap Toe-Loop Sandals
  • C5895 Sightseer Ankle-Wrap Sandals in Shiny Silver
  • C5897 Sightseer Lace-Up Sandals
  • C6090 Sightseer Ankle-Wrap Sandals in Metallic Sand

If you own any of these styles, stop wearing them immediately and contact Madewell by calling 866-544-1937 or emailing 24/7@madewell.com. For more information, head to www.madewell.com and click on “Important Notice.”



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Andrea Cammelleri’s Parking Ticket Tossed Because Of Missing Comma

MIDDLETOWN, Ohio (AP) — An appeals court has agreed with an Ohio woman who said her parking citation should be tossed because the village law was missing a comma.

Andrea Cammelleri (kah-meh-LEHR’-ee) says she shouldn’t have been issued a citation in 2014 based on the wording of the law enacted by the village of West Jefferson.

The law lists several types of vehicles that can’t be parked longer than 24 hours, including a “motor vehicle camper,” with the comma missing between “vehicle” and “camper.”

Cammelleri says her pickup truck did not fit that definition.

The village says the law’s meaning was clear in context, but Judge Robert Hendrickson of the 12th Ohio District Court of Appeals says in last week’s ruling that West Jefferson should amend the law if it wants it read differently.

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
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How To Make DIY Flower Crowns, Because They Aren’t Just For Brides And Hippies Anymore

diy

There are certain music festival trends that we hope never make the transition to mainstream (read: all-fringe everything), but there are others we welcome with open arms. Take the flower crown, for instance, which was once exclusively the territory of bohemian brides and hippie flower children. It’s now become a summer staple (thanks, Beyoncé!).

It’s for good reason: The flower crown looks good on everyone, complements any hair style (including bad hair days), smells delightful, and looks just at home on the beach as it does at a bachelorette party or baby shower. But the best thing about flower crowns has to be that you can make them yourself — really, it’s surprisingly easy and cheap to string something together. You can have customizable headgear all summer long.

In Hawaii, flower crowns are known as haku lei — just another version of the traditional lei. Women rock them at the beach for no particular reason, or make them for friends and loved ones on special occasions. They’re so ubiquitous and popular that Honolulu-based flower shop Paiko hosts a DIY flower crown workshop three times a week.

The women at Paiko have become experts on the process, and graciously shared the below tips so we can all blossom into summer with the freshest of trends.


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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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How To Make DIY Flower Crowns, Because They Aren’t Just For Brides And Hippies Anymore

diy

There are certain music festival trends that we hope never make the transition to mainstream (read: all-fringe everything), but there are others we welcome with open arms. Take the flower crown, for instance, which was once exclusively the territory of bohemian brides and hippie flower children. It’s now become a summer staple (thanks, Beyoncé!).

It’s for good reason: The flower crown looks good on everyone, complements any hair style (including bad hair days), smells delightful, and looks just at home on the beach as it does at a bachelorette party or baby shower. But the best thing about flower crowns has to be that you can make them yourself — really, it’s surprisingly easy and cheap to string something together. You can have customizable headgear all summer long.

In Hawaii, flower crowns are known as haku lei — just another version of the traditional lei. Women rock them at the beach for no particular reason, or make them for friends and loved ones on special occasions. They’re so ubiquitous and popular that Honolulu-based flower shop Paiko hosts a DIY flower crown workshop three times a week.

The women at Paiko have become experts on the process, and graciously shared the below tips so we can all blossom into summer with the freshest of trends.


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Style – The Huffington Post
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Naya Rivera To Release Memoir Called ‘Sorry Not Sorry,’ Because That’s Something She Would Do

Great news for anyone who ever wanted to read anything written by Naya Rivera. The former “Glee” star announced on Monday that she’s releasing a memoir, and it has the most Naya Rivera title ever: Sorry Not Sorry: Dreams, Mistakes, and Growing Up.

Rivera is promising “juicy” stories — and she’s not sorry about it.

Sorry Not Sorry: Dreams, Mistakes, and Growing Up is set to hit shelves in spring 2016.

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Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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Criticisms I’ve Faced Because I’m Engaged In My Early Twenties

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I think a lot of people have misconceptions about women who get engaged in their early twenties, but it’s the best decision I’ve ever made. People have told me that if I get married this young that I won’t be able to enjoy all that life has to offer, but to me it seems that my fiancé helps me enjoy life even more than I did before we started dating.

I’ve heard that women who marry young are somehow incapable of making good decisions or, at least, are not able to make decisions logically. But I tell people love isn’t blind. Jacob and I think very carefully and critically before making important decisions, and getting engaged was no exception.

Some articles I’ve seen about the topic of young engagements focus on the benefits of being able to have children young while you still have plenty of energy to raise them. However, I can’t relate to this particular advantage. I don’t want to have children (in the traditional sense): I want to adopt, but not for at least another fifteen years. I factored in children to make sure Jacob and I are on the same page, but I am not getting married to have them.

Why fifteen years before children? Jacob and I will spend approximately the first ten years of our marriage continuing to pursue higher education. He will go on to earn a Master’s Degree in Computer Science or Statistics while I earn a law degree and a Master’s Degree in Latin American & Caribbean Studies. Then both of us hope to start PhD programs. In ten years we will no longer be Mr. & Mrs. but rather Dr. & Dr. Once we build our careers, then we will focus on building a family.

Several women are under the notion that I will suddenly end my higher education goals the day I get married. Trust me, I am a human, not a robot, so getting married will not change me into a baby- making machine who leaves school in the dust. Female hormones are not that powerful people. (And who says women cannot have babies and get their degrees too?) (Or that hormones can make a woman change her mind?) When I am married, even though Jacob and I will be legally, emotionally and financially tied, I will still be my own person with my own unique goals and ambitions. Even better, since Jacob also wants his PhD, we look forward to sharing that experience together.

Another reason that people don’t like couples getting married young is because they think it won’t last. We both have great examples of lasting relationships with our grandparents and parents. If we were not certain about our potential to have a legacy of love then we would not enter into holy matrimony.

People also don’t understand why we would settle down and forgo multiple sexual partners in the future. Once again, we aren’t worried about it. We prefer a committed, monogamous environment even though we are both open people. Because we are so comfortable with each other we never have to leave our safe environment to have fun. It’s just one of the many benefits of unconditional love.

Jacob and I have talked a lot about all of the negative comments we have received when we tell people about our engagement. I was inspired to write this article because most of the negative comments come from strangers and non- immediate family who can’t understand why we would get married so young. Most critics are actually women who don’t mind Jacob getting married young but who mind me getting married young. It’s a huge double standard. It is important for us women to lift each other up even if one of us makes a different choice. This is why I love Amy Poehler’s saying, “Good for her, not for me.” I actually thought a lot about whether or not to even write this article because I don’t like feeling as though I need to explain myself for people to accept and share in my happiness. However, writing is cathartic and once I complied all my thoughts into one place it felt like a huge weight off my shoulders.

Ultimately, I am very proud of all of my life choices so I love spreading happiness around, the engagement included. If I need to explain my experiences so people can empathize with a different point of view, I’m all for it! I hope that by sharing this piece of our lives with you all that it clears up any preconceived notions. We hope you will share joy with us on the happy occasion of our engagement!

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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Seinfeld Doesn’t Mind If You Make Fun Of His Finale Because He Has No Feelings

Jerry Seinfeld is fine if you joke about the heavily criticized last episode of “Seinfeld.” That is — as long as he considers it a “good joke.”

While speaking at the Vulture Festival on Saturday, Seinfeld shared his opinion on the joke Julia Louis-Dreyfuss delivered about the “Seinfeld” finale on the last episode of “Late Show with David Letterman.” (The joke: “Thanks for letting me take part in another hugely disappointing series finale.”)

“I like all jokes,” Seinfeld said. “There’s really nothing else I care about except jokes. I don’t care who has them, whose feelings have to be hurt — if it’s a good joke I’m into it.”

Seinfeld mentioned that the joke was a second option after he and Louis-Dreyfuss pushed back on the first, and wondered if the writers had been hesitant to use it at first to spare his feelings.

“Maybe they didn’t want to hurt my feelings. That’s what it may have been: That they had that joke and they didn’t want to hurt my feelings and then, of course, they don’t know I don’t have feelings.”

It’s unclear whether “Seinfeld” co-creator Larry David would feel the same way, as he’s revealed in previous interviews that the negative reception to the show’s finale still influences him. Speaking to Bill Simmons in December, he mentioned how audience perception of the episode has made him hesitant to end “Curb Your Enthusiasm” in a similar fashion.

“I got so much grief from the ‘Seinfeld’ finale, which a lot of people intensely disliked, that I no longer feel a need to wrap things up.” he said.

For more of Seinfeld’s comments, head over to Vulture.

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Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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Josh Hartnett Lost Out On Another Role Because He Passed On ‘Batman’

Josh Hartnett regrets passing on “Batman,” but not for the reason you may think.

Speaking to HuffPost Live on Wednesday, the actor explained that he’d met with Christopher Nolan while the director was casting for the 2005 installment, but he’d actually hoped to discuss his next film, “The Prestige,” instead.

“[‘Batman’] was not what I was interested in,” Hartnett recalled. “I really wanted to convince him that when he did the ‘The Prestige,’ maybe hire me.”

“And then, of course, as time went on, he ended up hiring the guy who he hired to play ‘Batman’ to play in ‘The Prestige,'” Hartnett continued, referring to Christian Bale.

The experience served as a teachable moment for the “Penny Dreadful” star.

“I realized much later that this is a relationship business,” said Hartnett, adding that he “regret[s] not forming a relationship with a great filmmaker [Christopher Nolan].”

“That was not necessarily where my head was at the time,” he concluded.

Watch more from Josh Hartnett’s conversation with HuffPost Live.

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Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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Oregon Fans Get Married In Rose Bowl Parking Lot Because They’re ‘Big Football Fans’

PASADENA, Calif. (AP) — Steven Twomey and Lisa DeFluri were set to have a beach wedding in Oregon in July. But when their beloved Oregon Ducks got a berth to the College Football Playoff semifinal at the Rose Bowl, they changed their plans.

Twomey and DeFluri were married Thursday at the tailgate party in Pasadena about 100 yards from the entrance to the stadium.

DeFluri said it just felt right. “We’re big football fans.”

The two 25-year-old teachers from Eugene were married by Twomey’s stepdad, who registered online to perform the ceremony. DeFluri’s parents couldn’t make it but they were able to watch via Skype.

There were plenty of Oregon fans stopping to congratulate the happy couple when they saw the green and gold arch and ‘just got hitched’ sign.

oregon rose bowl
Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Did Coco Chanel Become the Designer She Was Because She Was…Single?

A fashion professor has raised an interesting point I’ve never thought about before: Was Coco Chanel‘s success tied, partially, to the fact that she never married? The designer wasn’t without her share of long-term, emotionally charged love affairs; one theory for the beyond-famous interlocking C’s is that the logo was created as a way to immortalize the love between Chanel and Boy Capel after he passed away. But lovers aside, no one ever put a ring on it.

coco-chanel-2

“For Chanel and young divorcée Madeleine Vionnet, their single status, atypical for the time, meant radically rethinking their relationship to the male gaze and therefore to style,” Alice Litscher, a professor in fashion communication at the Institut Français de la Mode in Paris, told The Guardian. “Vionnet’s loose bias cuts or Coco’s tweeds expressed a radical sense of liberation from classical femininity and seduction.”

Chanel was paramount in changing how women viewed style, introducing comfortable jersey and taking inspiration from the uniforms of sailors, both of which combined to create the easy shifts we still wear today (Downton Abbey watchers, think about when you first noticed the female characters’ costumes begin to change—that would’ve been Chanel’s influence at play).

Have you read a Chanel biography? If you haven’t, I’m suggesting it for any lazy couch time over the holidays. She was fascinating.





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Now You Can Dive To A Massive Underwater Sculpture Because Art

The Bahamas are known for pink-sand beaches, insanely cool private islands, pigs that swim and great diving. And near Nassau, we’ve found a new treasure that’s definitely worth diving for — an artwork that is, according to its creator, the largest single underwater sculpture in the world.

The sculpture, called “Ocean Atlas,” is a rendition of a Bahamian girl that measures over 16 feet high and weighs more than 60 tons. Conveniently, “Ocean Atlas” also doubles as an artificial reef for marine animals. Created by British artist and diver Jason DeCaires Taylor, the sculpture sits underwater just off the coast of Nassau.

During low tide, divers will be able to see a mirror reflection of the sculpture in addition to the marine life that will live on “Ocean Atlas.” The sculpture is intended to divert divers to artificial reefs (as opposed to natural ones) to prevent further damage of marine habitats.

Take a look!

Previously, Taylor has created sculptures to support sustainable life for the Cancun Underwater Museum and multiple artificial reef-sculpture hybrids. According to his biography, Taylor “founded and created the world’s first underwater sculpture park” off the coast of Grenada.

You can see the rest of Jason deCaires Taylor’s work on his website or Facebook page.
Arts – The Huffington Post
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John Goodman And Megan Mullally Star In This 1980s McDonald’s Commercial, Because Zero To Hero

Every actor has to start somewhere! Even Emmy-award winning John Goodman and Megan Mullally, who both appear in this vintage Mcdonald’s breakfast commercial. (You’re welcome.)

Next time you’re watching the clock during a commercial break, remember that random dish soap actress could be a huge star like any day now.


Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Tommy Davidson: People Care About Hannibal Buress’ Bill Cosby Takedown Because Of Race

Comedian Hannibal Buress’ scathing stand-up set lambasting “rapist” Bill Cosby made headlines last week, but “In Living Color” alum Tommy Davidson thinks there’s a racial element to all the attention.

In a HuffPost Live interview on Friday, Davidson weighed in on Buress’ set, during which he brought up the multiple allegations of sexual abuse that have marred Cosby’s reputation.

“It seems like the media only picks up on African Americans when they have these public beefs,” he told host Marc Lamont Hill. “You never see, like, Woody Allen saying something about Mel Brooks. And even if they did, there’s never a headline.”

When it came to the motivation behind Buress’ bit, Davidson said the move was “not really” a publicity stunt, but he remained cynical.

“It works for [Buress] though. … This weekend everybody knows who he is,” he said.

Click here to check out the full HuffPost Live interview with comedian Tommy Davidson.

Sign up here for Live Today, HuffPost Live’s new morning email that will let you know the newsmakers, celebrities and politicians joining us that day and give you the best clips from the day before!
Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Walmart: Tracy Morgan Partly To Blame In Truck Accident Because He Wasn’t Wearing Seatbelt

DAVID PORTER, Associated Press

NEWARK, N.J. (AP) — Actor-comedian Tracy Morgan and other people in a limousine struck from behind by a Wal-Mart truck on a highway in June are at least partly to blame for their injuries because they weren’t wearing seatbelts, the company said in a court filing Monday.

The filing was made in federal court in response to a lawsuit Morgan filed in July over the accident, which killed his friend James McNair, who was accompanying the former “Saturday Night Live” and “30 Rock” star back from a show in Delaware. Morgan spent several weeks in rehab with rib and leg injuries.

Wal-Mart Stores Inc., based in Bentonville, Arkansas, said in the filing that the passengers’ injuries were caused “in whole or in part” by their “failure to properly wear an appropriate available seatbelt restraint device,” which it said constitutes unreasonable conduct.

An attorney representing Morgan and the other plaintiffs called Wal-Mart’s contentions “surprising and appalling.”

“It’s disingenuous,” attorney Benedict Morelli said. “It’s not what they said they were going to do initially, which was take full responsibility. I’m very upset, not for myself but for the families I represent.”

The lawsuit seeks a jury trial and punitive and compensatory damages. It says the retail giant should have known that its truck driver had been awake for more than 24 hours before the crash and that his commute of 700 miles from his home in Georgia to work in Delaware was “unreasonable.” It also alleges the driver fell asleep at the wheel.

Wal-Mart spokeswoman Brooke Buchanan said in an email that the company “continues to stand willing to work with Mr. Morgan and the other plaintiffs to resolve this matter.”

Passengers Ardley Fuqua and Jeffrey Millea and Millea’s wife, Krista Millea, also are named as plaintiffs in the lawsuit. Krista Millea was not in the limousine when the crash occurred but is a plaintiff because she has a related loss-of-services lawsuit stemming from the crash.

Truck driver Kevin Roper, of Jonesboro, Georgia, pleaded not guilty to death by auto and assault by auto charges in state court. A criminal complaint also accuses him of not sleeping for more than 24 hours before the crash, a violation of New Jersey law.

A report by federal transportation safety investigators said Roper was driving 65 mph in the minute before he slammed into the limo van. The speed limit on that stretch of the New Jersey Turnpike is 55 mph and was lowered to 45 mph that night because of construction.

Roper had been on the job about 13 1/2 hours at the time of the crash, the report concluded. Federal rules permit truck drivers to work up to 14 hours a day, with a maximum of 11 hours behind the wheel.
Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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Hello Kitty Is Not A Cat Because Nothing Makes Sense Anymore

You might want to sit down for this one.

Sanrio has revealed Hello Kitty — the supposedly adorable feline character that adorns everything from lunch boxes and toasters to t-shirts and lingerie — is, in fact, not a cat. We repeat NOT A CAT.

Just what is Hello Kitty, you’re asking?

Hello Kitty is a human girl (and a British one at that), Christine R. Yano, the author of “Pink Globalization: Hello Kitty’s Trek Across the Pacific,” told The Los Angeles Times.

“Hello Kitty is not a cat. She’s a cartoon character. She is a little girl. She is a friend. But she is not a cat. She’s never depicted on all fours. She walks and sits like a two-legged creature,” Yano explained to the Times.

And if you are ready for your mind to be just a little more blown, the character we all know as Hello Kitty is actually Kitty White — a Scorpio who loves apple pie, and is the daughter of George and Mary White.

“She has a twin sister. She’s a perpetual third-grader. She lives outside of London. I could go on. A lot of people don’t know the story and a lot don’t care,” Yano told the paper.

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For more on Hello Kitty, head over to the Los Angeles Times.

Style – The Huffington Post
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7 Ways to Like Your Body More (Because We’re Tired of the BS)

This post originally appeared on Bustle.

By Rachel Krantz

If there’s one thing that’s become clear to me over the last few years, it’s this: Nearly every woman I meet, work with or assume is perfect probably struggles with her body image. No, we don’t all have eating disorders or even disordered eating habits. But, unfortunately, every woman I’ve ever taken the time to ask has admitted she has an issue with at least one part of her body, face or appearance.

Personally, I came to the disordered eating party a bit late. I had managed to mostly fixate on disliking other parts of myself (see: my personality) until I was 24, when I took a job working the night shift as an editor at a different website. I suddenly found myself under increasing amounts of stress, and (just for extra credit!) in a half-baked relationship with a guy who withheld his affection.

My body understandably freaked out. My stomach felt bloated and tense all the time. When I went to the doctor, she suggested I go gluten-free, which did help somewhat, but created a new problem. Cutting something completely out of your diet can be dangerous, and for me, it led to a cycle of restricting foods that fell into the “bad” category, only to binge on all my “good” foods when I got off work in the middle of the night.

Food became the cause, the reward and the punishment; the funnel through which I attempted to pour control over a job and relationship that left me feeling increasingly disconnected from my body.

Now, just two years later, I view the path to regaining a healthy relationship with my body as one of the most important challenges of my 20s. Therapy, a new job and a new relationship have all been essential ingredients. But the real work? I’ve been teaching myself — deliberately, and in small ways, everyday — to love my body again.

Recovering from an eating disorder, body dysmorphia or any kind of ongoing body image issue is no small task, and professional help should always be sought. But if you’re looking to supplement that help with some small, tangible exercises, I highly recommend using these practices as jumping off points.

Meditate for just 10 minutes a day

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For me, meditation has truly changed everything about my relationship with myself. I resisted meditating for a long time, because I thought I was failing at it if my mind wasn’t completely empty. But as I’ve learned more about meditation over the past year, I found out that those thoughts are actually an essential part of the practice. By simply sitting with yourself and focusing on your breath, you are forced to become friends with the voices in your head (and yes, we all have them).

Often, without even realizing it, we have a downright abusive relationship with ourselves. We tend to bark orders, judge and degrade ourselves (sadly, especially as women). By just sitting and attempting to reconnect to the present moment through our breath, we become reacquainted with our our mind and learn to drive it — rather than the other way around.

It’s nearly impossible to hate someone once you truly get to know them. Meditating has helped me foster a kinder relationship with myself, so that when my mind inevitably goes to self-hating places, I actually notice it, because that voice doesn’t sound like the friend I’ve come to know.

To begin, try this exercise: Sit cross-legged and upright. Place one hand on your heart, and the other on a part of your body you tend to fixate on (for me it’s my stomach). Close your eyes and try to cultivate a feeling of love and acceptance — just love and acceptance — for that part of your perfectly imperfect body.

When you feel done, open your eyes, stare softly straight ahead and try to focus on your breath for just five minutes. Don’t alter your breath or get mad at yourself for having inevitable thoughts and feelings come up. Just notice whatever is naturally there. When thoughts arise, note them and then try to come back to your breath.

If intense feelings surface, try to feel where they are in your body. (Where do you feel pain or fear? For me, it’s also in my stomach.) Let whatever feelings you’re having wash over you fully, if only for a moment. Don’t push the uncomfortable away. Instead, let yourself feel whatever it is you’re feeling and then, simply return to your breath.

It’s that simple and that difficult. Do this for five minutes in the morning and five minutes before bed and trust me, interesting things will begin to happen.

Confront your own image

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When I was feeling my worst, I’d often cast my eyes down when passing my mirror, just to avoid my own image. (Oh, and then I’d beat myself up for being so idiotic, which was super productive.)

One day, when I was really fed up with my mirror-avoidance, I got a crazy idea: What if I made a video of myself on Photobooth and described, to my own face, what I saw? What if I turned the inner mirror monologue out?

Here’s all I did: I turned on Photobooth’s video camera and looked at myself as I was speaking and recording. The result was super weird and kind of cool (who doesn’t like seeing what they actually look like when they talk?), and shockingly, it was also empowering.

I told the camera what I saw and what I did and didn’t like. The results were surprising: What I thought I hated (my stomach) was actually not what I found myself disliking in realtime. Of course, I found plenty of other things to dislike just as strongly, as well as some surprising parts of myself that I found fundamentally OK, even kind of adorable. I realized, once again, that no matter what I “fix” there will always be more parts of myself to change.

By giving voice to my inner critic and making myself basically say it to my own face, a funny thing happened: That critic lost a little of her power. She finally had her chance to say her piece out loud, and though she’s never one to shut up completely, she was able to step aside for the rest of the night.

Be naked more

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Oh god, I can just feel my roommates cringing. No, not naked in the kitchen or living room (unless you live alone, in which case hello naked cooking), but in your own bedroom. Since I’ve started sleeping naked, not only do I sleep better (your temperature is better regulated) but I’ve also starting appreciating my body more. When I wake up, I do some naked yoga and stretch in front of the mirror. Laugh all you want, but it’s a great way to greet the day; moving, breathing and confronting my own beautiful, healthy body. I highly recommend it. If you live with a partner, don’t be shy — they will love it too.

Make self-love dates

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Hey, you’re already naked, right? This is one we women somehow often forget to do, and believe me, it has repercussions. Just think of it this way: Almost every guy out there masturbates regularly. You think the fact that they walk around the world like they own it isn’t connected?

While I’m not much of a morning person, I do believe that making time to connect to your own body in that way (even if you are having sex regularly) is crucial to having a healthy relationship with your body. If you only have orgasms with a partner, you will, on some level, always need to have someone on the outside affirming that you’re sexy and lovable. Masturbating helps you connect with what you want and how damn fine you really are. Make a date with yourself, and if it helps motivate you, consider it exercise — it gets your heart rate up, flexes plenty of muscles and has numerous mental and physical health benefits.

Try a writing exercise

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I’ve found that even if I write for 10 minutes once a week, it can really help me tap into what’s actually going on. If words don’t start pouring out of you right away, try this simple exercise to focus on body image:

First, imagine your inner food critic. She’s the voice that tells you that you shouldn’t have eaten that second piece of cake or that says you look ugly when you’re brushing your teeth or that you would have a partner if you only lost 10 pounds.

Give the pen to her and write out everything she thinks about you and your body. Keep the pen moving for five minutes and don’t edit or stop writing. When you think you’ve run out of nasty things to say to yourself, just keep going until time is up.

When you’re done, hand the pen over to your “inner best friend” and write for five minutes. Your inner best friend is the kindest part of yourself — and not necessarily the voice you should always channel — but she is the other extreme. Keep writing in her voice until time is up.

So, for example, while the food critic might have written “You know you can’t eat that because when you let go you start getting fat,” the sweetheart writes “Eat anything you want! You will still be loved with 15 more pounds.”

Giving voice to both of these extremes may help you meet somewhere in the middle, where your actual opinion lies. Do this exercise with care and some caution, and remember — the critic is just that — a critic.

Don’t make plans on Sunday for a month

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I got this idea from my friend Natalie, and I liked it so much that I try to do this every weekend now. You’re probably wondering what not making plans has to do with body image. Well, for me, one of the hardest things about recovering a healthy relationship with food has been learning to listen to when I’m hungry again. I found that during my period of restricting and binging I had lost touch with what I really wanted.

Not making plans on Sundays has helped me get back in touch with what I actually want, rather than what I think I should want. When I wake up without plans, I actually ask myself: What do you feel like doing right now? Whereas in the past I would have already formed a list of errands or social obligations for the day, now I just do whatever it is I genuinely feel like doing.

Sometimes it’s sleeping another hour. Sometimes it’s running errands. Sometimes it’s cooking brunch or simply laying in the park all day. I try to follow each urge, moment to moment, and simply act in accordance to what I want to do, without judging myself. It’s incredibly liberating and relaxing, and has not only made my weekends a hell of a lot more fun, but has also helped me communicate with myself on a much more honest level.

View this as a communal struggle

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I saved the most important tip for last. Yes, meditating and all of the work you can do on your own is crucial. But one of the most suffocating aspects of struggling with body image is that we all think it’s our own dirty little secret. If you’re anything like me, you probably even feel stupid, guilty or embarrassed of having these “trivial” thoughts to begin with. You may even feel that if you don’t have a full-blown eating disorder you don’t deserve to talk about the ups and downs of your relationship with food and your body.

In fact, you must talk about it — not just for yourself, but also for other women. Talking to your friends about body image, and asking about their own experience, is crucial for destigmatizing what I believe is still very much taboo: Most of us are, on some level, struggling with this.

I’ll never forget one day here last year at Bustle, when we had our first company headshots taken. Looking at the digital images that day, I felt particularly awful about the way I looked. But instead of just keeping it inside, I admitted to my coworkers Meredith and Alex that I was feeling bad — and they chimed in with relief that they had been feeling annoyed about their pictures too. The joy we felt at sharing how we were actually feeling was palpable. So, naturally, we decided to take a whole bunch of flattering selfies on (once again) Photobooth.

I felt not only beautiful, but also empowered: We had taken our own image back.

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Talk to your friends about this stuff and you’ll quickly find that they too are probably struggling to figure out what a healthy relationship with their body looks like. After all, things have gotten mighty tangled: Because the language of female perfection has in many ways shifted from “being skinny” to being “healthy,” it can often feel as if we’re the only ones for whom “being healthy” doesn’t actually feel very healthy at all.

Every time we give another woman permission to talk about her experience openly, we reclaim a little power from a society that tells us we should just grin and juice cleanse it.

And that, much like my reflection in the mirror, is a beautiful thing.

More from Bustle:

Yes, Men Struggle With Body Image Issues, Too: Here’s My Story

Is Picky Eating an Eating Disorder? Living With Selective Eating Disorder and No Vegetables

Thyroid Symptoms in Women are Hard to Catch, But They Sure Messed Up My Life

Images: Tumblr, The New Yorker
Style – The Huffington Post
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Ikea Advertises Adoptable Dogs In Stores, Because Every Home Needs A Rescue Pup

Furniture might help make a living space comfortable, but nothing makes a house a home like a furry best friend.

With that in mind, some Ikea stores are now featuring cardboard cutouts of adoptable dogs in their showrooms amid the furniture, AFP Relaxnews reported. The cutouts have tags on them with QR codes that shoppers can scan to learn more about the individual dogs.

The idea to display the pets inside the store started in Singapore as a collaboration between Ikea and two animal shelters, according to Business Insider. Together they formed the project Home for Hope.

Now, an Ikea store in Tempe, Arizona, is joining in on the innovative plan to find homes for rescue animals.

“We thought it was a perfect way to show people what their home would look like with a pet in it,” Becky Blaine, Ikea Tempe’s marketing director, told the outlet.

All of the six animals featured in cutouts at the store in Tempe have now been adopted from the Arizona Humane Society, and more cutouts will be exhibited in the store at the end of the month, according to the outlet. At least eight pups have been adopted in Singapore so far, according to the Home for Hope website.

Checkout some of dogs on display in Singapore:

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