Rites of Passage: Excavating My Childhood Photos — and Myself

I wanted to uncover ancient shards of my childhood gender and piece them back into the whole.
NYT > Style

SPECIAL ONLINE DEALS!

Kenneth Cole Productions, Inc.

The First Time: Shirley Manson: The First Time I Cut Myself

Trapped in an unhealthy relationship, this musician found relief and power in self-harming. Today, she vigilantly avoids the patterns that got her there.
NYT > Arts

SPECIAL TRAVEL DISCOUNTS:
Orbitz Worldwide Inc

Boyega: Star Wars allowed me to invest in myself

At 26 years old John Boyega is already expanding his CV.
Entertainment News – Latest Celebrity & Showbiz News | Sky News

ENTERTAINMENT SPECIALS:

Piven: ‘I never forced myself on anyone’

Entourage star Jeremy Piven has denied fresh allegations of sexual misconduct, saying the claims are “false”.
Entertainment News – Latest Celebrity & Showbiz News | Sky News

ENTERTAINMENT SPECIALS:

‘Got myself a fiancee’: Ed Sheeran is engaged

Singer Ed Sheeran has announced he is engaged to girlfriend Cherry Seaborn.
Entertainment News – Latest Celebrity & Showbiz News | Sky News

ENTERTAINMENT SPECIALS:

Gyllenhaal: ‘I take myself very seriously’

Jake Gyllenhaal is a serious actor. From Donnie Darko to Brokeback Mountain, he has built a reputation for taking on complex characters and making them real.
Entertainment News – Latest Celebrity & Showbiz News | Sky News

ENTERTAINMENT SPECIALS:

Modern Love: Single, Unemployed and Suddenly Myself

After hooking up with a much younger man, a woman realizes she has been looking for love all wrong.
NYT > Fashion & Style

SPECIAL ONLINE DEALS!

Kenneth Cole Productions, Inc.

Lena Dunham On Body Image: ‘I’ve Always Been Like Rihanna To Myself’

After six seasons of her hit HBO series “Girls,” Lena Dunham says she never quite understood the extensive criticism she got about her nudity on the show. 

On Tuesday, the actress and show-runner joined co-producer, Jenni Konner, and moderator, America Ferrera, for an in-depth discussion on the legacy of the show at the Tribeca Film Festival. Ferrera, recalling her own experience starring on the ABC show “Ugly Betty,” asked Konner and Dunham how they felt about the reactions to Dunham’s “non-traditional” body. 

“Men, generally, were very angry that she felt comfortable showing her body,” Konner commented.

“In the third season, a reporter from The Wrap raised his hand at [a press conference] and asked ‘Why do you show your body so much?’ And I had a rage spiral.”

For Dunham, the vitriolic reaction to her body confidence seemed to stem from the fact that she didn’t feel she was being “so brave” by doing nude scenes. 

“I’ve always been like Rihanna to myself. Like, I just have a great time with my own body,” the actress explained.

“I think people were so ready to believe that I was, like, jumping past some massive hurdle in order to get naked on television. That’s not where my fear lies. If that’s what scared me, I wouldn’t do it every week.”

Dunham added that she got more criticism from men and women who “also didn’t have perfect bodies” than anyone else. 

“Some of the most love and compliments I’ve gotten have been from women who are considered to have perfect and beautiful bodies, who I think feel the constant pressure to maintain those bodies,” Dunham added.

“They seemed to have felt freed in some way by seeing me just say ‘fuck it.’”

Now that “Girls” is over, Dunham has plans to focus on her online feminist newsletter, Lenny Letter. She and Konner announced plans to expand the newsletter into a traveling variety show this May

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Entertainment – The Huffington Post
Entertainment News-Visit Adults Playland today for the hottest adult entertainment online!

I Gave Myself Cancer, I Can Take It Away!

I Gave Myself Cancer, I Can Take It Away!


I am bold, brave and daring. I did the unthinkable. I went against traditional medical wisdom and came out a huge winner. I went against the grain of conventional surgery, radiation, chemo and other drug therapy, to embark upon a journey that transformed my life. This story is sometimes humorously conversational and details a journey that everyone who wants health without pills, potions, or sickening side effects needs to hear. The cures are here for cancer and every other type of immune system-related disease. The answers are in alternative medicine, and I’m just one of thousands who defeated cancer using unconventional means. It’s easy to regain your health without compromising consequences. The real question is, are you ready for it? Are you ready to take back responsibility for your own health and put it where it belongs, in your hands? “This book is a must read for anyone who has cancer, knows someone with cancer, or who would like to avoid cancer or any disease!” -Jean Sumner, author of Journey to Raw: 52 Weekly Changes to add more raw food to your diet and co-founder of World Wellness Education “A bible for healthy self-wellness. Heartfelt, sincere, intimate, straightforward, and educational!” -Frederic Delarue, music composer and author of Eyes of Your Heart: Create a New Life Through the Eyes of Your Heart “An alternative view of alternative medicine, I Gave Myself Cancer provides much food for thought in the important field of holistic self-healing.” -Suzanne Giesemann, author of Messages of Hope

Price: $
Sold by Kobo Canada

‘I Can’t Bring Myself To Empathize With My Wife’

Reader Unempathic Husband writes,

I found your site and have spent several hours reading posts (obviously, it’s after 2AM), as I find it on point and no bullshit. I’m willing to, as you say, cast a critical eye on myself with regards to my relationship with my wife. Here’s my question: I find myself — sometimes reflexively — angry and resentful to the point that I have difficulty doing the things you suggest, i.e. empathetic and validating responses. A quite literal physical response.

I have made some progress on this through breathing and pacing (and digging my fingernail into my thumb to mute any unfair outward response), but what else can I do to get over this? I feel as though I am the woman sometimes, and my feelings and opinions are not being heard and have no value. I can’t say day without her saying night. My desire to want to be empathetic is very low. Thank you for your insights, and any additional advice you can provide.

man-158636_640

Dear UH,

Well, at least you’re acknowledging your block against empathizing.  This is half the battle, as most unempathic people say, “I would empathize if my partner just was more/less XYZ.”  You do allude to finding your wife contrary and difficult, but you are also noting that you have an overarching automatic response that prevents you from empathizing.

I encourage you to seek your own counseling and also to try couples work.  I bet that you saw angry and cold responses between caregivers in your childhood, because, otherwise, empathy would come more instinctively to you.  I also note that you write, “I feel like the woman…” and you equate being the woman with not feeling heard or validated.  This dynamic may have been one that you saw growing up, where one party’s opinion never matters.  If you saw a marriage where people were locked in a power struggle or where one person’s needs never mattered, it is likely that you are replicating that pattern unintentionally in your marriage now.  According to imago theory, your wife likely reminds you on a subconscious level of a caregiver who never validated or acknowledged your perspective, which is why it is so deeply triggering to you now when she opposes your views.

You need to learn new ways of responding, which likely start with figuring out why you yourself feel so triggered by your wife’s behavior that you shut down and are unable to put yourself in her shoes.  Empathy takes practice, but first it is essential to understand why you feel incapable of it, which is likely because little of it was shown to you or observed by you in early life.  After processing the impact of early observations and interactions, you can move forward and open yourself up to empathizing with your wife, which takes a lot of strength that you are not feeling right now.

I believe that the next step would be to share with your wife that you are trying to empathize with her, but you feel a mental block against it, and you need to figure out what is causing it.  That is when you can suggest couples work, as well as individual work for you. She will likely agree, if not the first time you suggest it, then eventually if you keep bringing it up. Good for you for trying to figure this out before the marriage is irrevocably harmed.  Keep me updated and till we meet again, I remain, The Blogapist Who Says, The Same Advice Goes When You Find It Hard To Empathize With Your Child.

This post was originally published here on Dr. Psych Mom. Follow Dr. Rodman on Dr. Psych Mom, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest.

Order 52 Emails to Transform Your Marriage and How to Talk to Your Kids about Your Divorce: Healthy, Effective Communication Techniques for Your Changing Family.

Learn about Dr. Rodman’s private practice, including therapy, coaching, and consultation, here. This blog is not intended as diagnosis, assessment, or treatment, and should not replace consultation with your medical provider.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Weddings – The Huffington Post
FASHION NEWS-Visit Shoe Deals Online-Fashion News today for the hottest deals online!

Jourdan Dunn on Her Two Met Gala 2016 Balmain Looks: ‘I Felt Really Good About Myself’

If you thought Jourdan Dunn killed it with her two Met Gala looks—both by Balmain—you’re not the only one. The British model herself agrees with you. “Last night I felt really good about myself,” she told PeopleStyle when we caught up with her on the set of a campaign shoot today. She paired the look with Stuart Weitzman heels and Eva Fehren jewelry.

Jourdan Dunn Met Gala 2016David Fisher/REX/Shutterstock; Kevin Mazur/Getty


Dunn fell right in line with the night’s overall trend: Bold silver gowns with a robot-like inspiration, a perfect fit for the Met Gala’s theme of ‘Manus x Machina: Fashion in an Age of Technology.’ Kim Kardashian, Kylie Kardashian, Kris Jenner, Cindy Crawford, Alessandra Ambrosio and Doutzen Kroes joined Dunn in wearing Balmain and, together, they walked the carpet as the #BalmainArmy, a hashtag the fashion house created in the past (and has stuck as a way to describe fans of the brand).

Instagram Photo

For Dunn’s look, she worked directly with Balmain creative director Olivier Rousteing. “Olivier sent two sketches—one was a short one and one was a long one,” she explained. “I was drawn to the long one, I thought it was amazing. When I had my fitting for it, it all came together.” As soon as her glam squad got a whiff of the direction, they suggested she pair the look with gray, silvery hair. “I thought it was a cool idea,” she said.

Instagram Photo

But despite the fact that she looked calm and collected in all of the photos, she admitted it’s actually a very nerve-wracking experience. “There are people everywhere, like waiting for you to walk out of your hotel and then all the paparazzi,” she said. “ It’s huge. So I was in the car, and I was nervous. But once I got on the red carpet, I just had to own it and feel myself.”

Instagram Photo

RELATED PHOTOS: Every Gorgeous Gown at the 2016 Met Gala

It’s a long way that she’s come from her first gala appearance in 2009 (below, with Karlie Kloss). “I remember when I first attended seven years ago, I felt so out of place and like I shouldn’t really be there,” she said. “Now I feel I do deserve to be here, I’ve worked hard. I like being in that mind frame.”

Jourdan Dunn First Met Gala LookErik C. Pendzich/REX/Shutterstock


After the gala concluded, Dunn slipped into a black sequined mini Balmain to head downtown to the Gilded Lily after-party. “The second look is all about being able to move and dance and just feel good,” she said. “With a Balmain dress, sometimes that’s a bit impossible because they’re so structured. But in my fitting, Olivier wanted to make sure I was able to move. It’s all about something fun and be able to move and get down in and look good in.”

But she didn’t change in the car. “Some people do that but I went back to my hotel, chilled, refreshed my makeup and changed really quick and headed out,” she said. (And no, the Army did not travel together.)

RELATED PHOTOS: The Biggest Trends at the 2016 Met Gala

So, how can regular people get into the #BalmainArmy? There’s no boot camp, unfortunately, she said. “I don’t know how I became a member,” she added, “but I’m happy to be in the army.”

Which Jourdan Dunn look did you like better: Met Gala or after-party? Tell us in the comments below!

—Sharon Clott Kanter


Style News – StyleWatch – People.com

Fashion Deals Update:

My Bookshelf, Myself: My 10 Favorite Books: Eileen Myles

The poet shares the titles she’d most want with her on a desert island.
NYT > Fashion & Style

SPECIAL ONLINE DEALS!

Kenneth Cole Productions, Inc.

My Bookshelf, Myself: My 10 Favorite Books: Eileen Myles

The poet shares the titles she’d most want with her on a desert island.
NYT > Fashion & Style

SPECIAL ONLINE DEALS!

Kenneth Cole Productions, Inc.

I Took a Naked Yoga Class and I’ve Never Felt Better About Myself

Yeah, totally naked, coed yoga.

Lifestyle – Esquire

SHOPPING DEALS UPDATE:


Selena Gomez on Her Sexy ”Hands to Myself” Music Video: It’s About Being ”Obsessed” With the ”False Reality” of Love

Selena Gomez, Hands To MyselfSelena Gomez soared to a whole new level of sexy with her music video for “Hands to Myself,” flaunting her hot body in just a bra and underwear, getting undressed for a scene in a bath tub…

E! Online (US) – Top Stories

Special Entertainment News Bulletin:


Check Groupon First

Chris Brown: I hated myself

Chris Brown shared a touching open letter with fans via social media on Thursday, in which he detailed some of his darkest moments.
Music-News.com RSS feed
The Best Concert Tickets in the Nation! $ 8 off any Event Ticket, Use Code: FALL8OFF at checkout with $ 40 minimum purchase. Find Tickets Now!

See the Next Epic BFF-Filled Music Video: Nicki Minaj and Beyonce’s “Feeling Myself”

Coachella need not advertise any longer, thanks to Beyonce and Nicki Minaj filming their music video for "Feeling Myself" there—and only making it look like the best time ever, flower crowns, pool parties, and all….




All Entertainment
Call Now: 877-516-9953

Nicki Minaj And Beyoncé Have An Awesome Summer Party In ‘Feeling Myself’ Video

Tidal subscribers were in luck on Monday when Nicki Minaj and Beyoncé dropped the video for “Feeling Myself” exclusively on the streaming service. The song, which appears on Minaj’s “The Pinkprint,” first leaked online last December. And now the video for “Feeling Myself” has leaked.

In the video, Minaj and Queen Bey play with squirt guns in inflatable pools in pink fur coats, eat cheeseburgers in a bounce house, have a champagne pool party and share Now and Laters. It’s pretty much the summer party of your dreams. (And proof that bucket hats only look good on Beyoncé.)

tv show gifs
Image via Tumblr

Beyoncé previously released her video for her new song “Die With You” on the artist-owned streaming service last month. Soon after, Rihanna released her video for “American Oxygen” and Jay Z released his music video for “Glory” via Tidal. There are also rumors that a possible Jay Z and Beyoncé joint album will exclusively premiere on Tidal, proving that the streaming service is serious about rewarding its users, especially after Jay Z’s special Tidal shows over the weekend.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Style – The Huffington Post
FASHION NEWS UPDATE-Visit Shoe Deals Online today for the hottest deals online for shoes!

LeBron: Got to protect myself a little more

After being the recipient of a second flagrant foul in his past three games, Cleveland Cavaliers forward LeBron James said he might have to take matters into his own hands in the future.
ESPN.com – NBA

Defending Myself From the Knee Defender

Legendary football coach Vince Lombardi once uttered the phrase, “The best defense is a good offense.” I plan to turn those words into action the next time I fly coach class.

By now everybody is familiar with the escalating brouhaha over personal space when flying. The skies seemed reasonably friendly until August 24, aboard United Flight 1462 between Newark and Denver. A female passenger trying to recline her coach seat was thwarted by the Knee Defender, a device the male passenger seated behind her had clipped to his tray table. She complained; he refused to remove the device. She threw water at him and the pilot made an unscheduled landing in Chicago, where both passengers were ordered to extricate themselves from the plane — no easy matter when crammed in coach. Since then, two similar disputes have caused the rerouting of flights.

I’m not surprised there was confrontation aboard Flight 1462; after all, it did originate in New Jersey. What shocked me was how many air travelers, through blogs and social media posts, defended Knee Defender Guy. Six-foot-plus individuals, laptop users and claustrophobes were among the most vocal. So naturally was Ira Goldman, the device’s creator.

Conversely, I’m solely behind Water Throwing Girl, feeling I should have the right to use whatever features come with my coach seat, limited as they are. Imagine buying a car with a top-of-the-line stereo system and stumbling across the following sentence in the owner’s manual: WARNING! DRIVER WILL NOT PLAY KENNY CHESNEY ON RADIO IF ANY COUNTRY MUSIC HATER IS IN VEHICLE.

Until this incident I had never seen, nor heard of, the Knee Defender. This, despite being a longtime 100,000 mile a year flier on American Airlines. Okay, my Executive Platinum status means I frequently get first class upgrades, free alcohol and the right to mock and elbow coach passengers on my way down the jet bridge (read the fine print), so maybe I’m not the most impartial candidate on this matter. But I also fly Southwest Airlines, where all passengers are treated like equal pieces of cattle headed to the slaughterhouse. Nobody has whipped out a Knee Defender, although I will probably see one soon. Sales of Goldman’s $ 21.95 device have reportedly skyrocketed.

Airline rule books appear split over the Knee Defender. Some carriers ban the device; others allow it but don’t advocate bringing it aboard. Until it is deemed illegal by everyone, I’m going to have to channel my inner Lombardi, creating an offense to counter Goldman’s device. Passing gas immediately comes to mind, but I have no qualm with anybody else in the row behind me. Or next to me. Or in front of me. Or across the aisle. Casually dumping a glass of red wine on the Knee Defender offender would look suspicious, as it would require a 180-degree move on my part.

The most obvious answer? Speed. During takeoff, seatbacks must be in the upright position, tray tables stowed, blah, blah, blah. Once the plane is airborne, I’m positive I can recline my seat faster than the passenger behind me can assemble the Knee Defender. You snooze, you lose.

So I’ve solved that dilemma. And now that my brain is in full airplane problem-conquering mode, I’m ready to market my own line of passenger defense mechanisms. For starters, I will patent the Elbow Separator, a thin metal sheet that easily divides a row’s community armrest. Side by side coach passengers get an equal three-quarters of an inch all the way to Hawaii.

Next comes the Shoulder Jolt, an electrically-charged cushion I’ll wear behind my neck. Any sleeping passenger whose head listlessly flops onto my shoulder mid-flight gets the shock of their lives, no pun intended.

Finally, don’t board without my number one creation, Foot Odor in a Jar. Put it in your pocket and discretely open it when your fellow passenger removes his shoes. The quickly intensifying smell tricks Stocking Feet Guy into thinking he is the source of the stink. Note: This product is not always needed; I’ve flown next to passengers whose feet smell far worse than anything produced in a lab.

So Mr. Goldman, the gauntlet has been thrown. Sit behind me on a flight and be prepared for creations you only wish you had designed. We can settle our differences like adults, but you may have to wake me first, as I like to sleep on planes.

Usually while reclining.

Copyright 2014 Greg Schwem distributed by Tribune Content Services, Inc.
Comedy – The Huffington Post
ENTERTAINMENT NEWS-Visit Mobile Playboy today for the hottest adult entertainment online!

I Can Dress Myself!

I Can Dress Myself!


Used – As they grow, children become more independent, sometimes with interesting effects. In this delightful story, a little girl decides that she can dress herself. Her clothing choices are interesting and unique. When she has completely dressed herself, the girl’s mother is surprised by the final outcome. This is a story of love, growing up, and understanding. Children will love sharing this book with their favorite adult.

Price: $
Sold by Alibris UK: books, movies

Aerie Model: ‘I Do Like To See A Little Retouching On Myself’

Lingerie store aerie found itself in the spotlight this week after the debut of its awesome new ad campaign featuring all unairbrushed models.

We (and almost everyone else) praised aerie for resisting the urge to retouch and tweak and perfect the bodies of the already gorgeous women in the ads. But one of the women, 28-year-old model Amber Tolliver, actually admitted that sometimes she likes getting airbrushed.

In an interview with Elle.com, Tolliver said:

“I do like to see a little retouching on myself. I mean, any normal person is slightly insecure about little things on their body, and you can blink an eye and poof it’s gone [in retouching], great.”

Surprised? We shouldn’t be — models are human, too. Christie Brinkley admitted that as a young model, she “felt so uncomfortable in that body,” while Cindy Crawford said earlier this year, “I’m a normal woman, sometimes I feel pretty good and some days I’m like, ‘Oh my God, nothing fits.'” Miranda Kerr, picture of perfection though she is, told Cosmo, “Models are some of the most insecure people I’ve ever met.”

That said, Tolliver said that she’d rather work on embracing the imperfections and go unretouched than have it all smoothed over — in fact, getting airbrushed can be offensive. She said to Elle.com, “To recreate a human being using a computer process is a bit of an attack on who you naturally are. Like, if I’m not good enough or if I’m not beautiful enough, then why’d you book me?”

Other models feel the same way. In 2010, after seeing her body whittled down in a charity shoot, Crystal Renn told The Today Show, “When I first saw the photos, I would have to say I was absolutely shocked… I didn’t think it was an accurate portrayal of my body in any way. I’m a size 10, and that’s more like a size 2.” After Ralph Lauren notoriously airbrushed her into oblivion, model Filippa Hamilton told the Daily News, “I was shocked to see that super skinny girl with my face.”

At the end of the day, it’s better to see a real body, even with the “little things” that make you insecure, than a body that’s not yours at all. Read more from Tolliver’s Q+A at Elle.com.

aerie 1

aerie 2

aerie

Stars speak out:

Want more? Be sure to check out HuffPost Style on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, Pinterest and Instagram at @HuffPostStyle.
Style – The Huffington Post
FASHION NEWS UPDATE-Visit Shoe Deals Online today for the hottest deals online for shoes!